No More
by missbrat155
Summary: Something's changed, and no one knows how to help her. What is Sara hiding? NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I wish I owned CSI, but obviously don't or I'd be writing real episodes and actually seeing my ideas on TV, not just fan fiction!_

_A/N – Hope you all like this one, please R&R! I don't know about pairings yet – normally I let the story form to see who should end up with whom, but my plan so far is NS, CW. Grissom will obviously have a very important role though ;)_

No More 

Chapter 1:

Sara stepped out of the hospital room and leaned against the wall taking a deep breath, trying to stop the tears from falling down her face. How could people be so cruel? She should've been out playing with her friends, hanging at the mall – not lying in a hospital bed. She saw Grissom walking towards her. She knew she couldn't lose it – not now. She had to find who did this, and if Grissom saw her, he would take her off the case. She took another deep breath and filed all her emotions to the back of her mind. How easy it had become just to ignore everything she was feeling.

"How's the victim?" Grissom asked, his eyes searching hers, reading more than she wanted him too. She closed her mind even further.

"Stable, but unconscious. Doctors don't know if she'll wake up. I just finished the rape kit – I'm going to get it to Greg." He looked at her with a questioning look.

"I thought Catherine…?" She shook her head.

"Lindsey got sick at school – I told her I would do it. It's no big deal Grissom – it's my job." He continued to look at her in silence. She felt uncomfortable under his glare. "Well, I should go get this to Greg. See you back at the lab." He nodded and she turned and walked away.

It wasn't just her lack of upset that bugged him; it was her lack of everything else too. She used to smile, she used to get extremely excited over things, but that also came with her getting upset and losing control. The last few weeks, he rarely saw her smile anymore. She didn't laugh like she used to. She also didn't cry. She had been doing so much better since her DUI, but something happened. Grissom couldn't put his finger on when but he knew that she was hiding something.

-+-+-

"Greg – can you process this for me? It's priority." Sara said to the younger lab tech. He looked at her stoic expression, slightly taken aback. He always enjoyed her company, but lately she wasn't the same Sara. Slowly she had been taken over by something, something eating her up inside. She still was the same Sara, only with less of the joy out of her life, but he saw something different. He couldn't pinpoint exactly what was unusual, only that in some way she had changed.

-+-+-

She went to the break room, anxious to eat something. It was amazing how easy it was to forget to eat sometimes. She thought back to the last time she had eaten, and it had been well over 15 hours previous. About to grab an apple from the fridge, Catherine burst into the room.

"Sara – Greg needs you in DNA right now. Thanks again for covering for me. Lindsey's fine, she's at home now with my mom." She nodded and gave her a small smile that didn't reach her eyes, suddenly not hungry anymore.

"No problem Cath. I'll head right over now." Catherine looked at her as she walked out of the room.

"Sara – you okay? You look a little pale, and you, well, just haven't been yourself lately." She shrugged.

"Nothing wrong, no, why?" was all she said. Catherine looked at her closely. It wasn't a typical Sara response.

"Just wondering – you look like you've lost weight too. You sure your okay? I'm here to talk to if you need me." Catherine smiled at her gently, trying not to push but knowing that everyone had noticed the small changes in Sara the last few weeks.

"Thanks Catherine, but honestly I'm fine. I should go find Greg. See you later." She walked out of the break room. Catherine watched her walk down the hall. She had lost weight. Just then, Warrick and Nick came into the room and noticed Catherine's look of concern.

"What's the matter Cath?" Warrick asked, slightly worried.

"I'm concerned about Sara." She turned to Nick, knowing that Sara and him were a lot closer than anyone else on the team.

"She has been acting different. She's not the same – I don't know what's wrong. She hasn't opened up to anyone." None of them knew what to do.

"When did this start?" asked Warrick. They all thought. It had been so gradual but something must have started it.

"She was seeing that guy, remember?" Nick nodded solemnly. He hadn't liked Chris much. He had seemed like such a jerk. From what Sara had said, which wasn't much, he had just dumped her and moved on. She had seemed okay with the breakup about 3 weeks ago, but that's really when she started acting weird.

"Maybe it has something to do with him?" Warrick asked. Nick sat, deep in thought.

"What should we do?" he asked, looking at Catherine, knowing as a woman, she probably knew what was best.

"For now, I think we should wait until she comes to one of us. Just act normal, but be supportive. Let her know you're there if she needs you but don't suffocate her or she'll pull away. Maybe it's just nothing and she'll be back to normal in no time." They all agreed and Catherine and Warrick left to get back to work.

Nick still sat in the break room wondering what could be wrong. They were right, he did know Sara better than the rest of them. They had become great friends and there was something about her that drew her to him. He couldn't figure out why she was pushing away. She had always talked to him about things, but hardly a word was said about Chris and why he had left. Deciding to be a better friend to her from now on, and showing her how much he cared, Nick made his way over to the lab to meet up with Sara and Greg.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N – Thanks for the reviews! I'm glad you like it so far... the idea kind of popped into my head so I decided to run with it. I love Nick/Sara stories even though I totally love Grissom too but anyways…we'll see! **

**Chapter 2:**

Everyone filed into the room, ready for Grissom to hand out the assignments. He looked around and immediately noticed an absence. He frowned.

"Where's Sara?" he asked. Just then Greg popped into the room.

"Boss – sorry to interrupt but I have something to show you when your done." He said quickly, about ready to leave again.

"Greg – wait…" Greg turned around and faced Grissom.

"Have you seen Sara at all tonight?" Greg glanced around the room and noticed her not there, then looked at his watch and shook his head.

"She's never late, especially not this late. I hope she's okay." Catherine didn't know if she should say anything, but her concern for Sara that won out.

"Has anyone else noticed that Sara's been a little "off" lately?" She asked, looking at her colleagues. They all nodded.

"More than off," said Greg. "She's not the same."

"We were talking about it yesterday. Something must have happened – maybe after she broke up with that Chris guy?" Nick said. Grissom sat back down, and Greg pulled up a chair.

"I don't know, I guess that's about the time it started but I mean, it's really been gradual it's hard to say." Catherine looked back and forth between all the men in the room. Being the only woman besides Sara, it was obvious that there was even more that only she picked up. Warrick, clueing into the fact that Catherine might have a better idea than the rest of them, piped up,

"What do you think Cath? I mean you're a woman too. Maybe there's something we're all missing. I know you said we should be there to listen and supportive and what not…" She looked at them, everyone's eyes glaring into hers. She sighed; she hadn't wanted to bring this stuff up but knew it was for the best.

"I guess you guys haven't noticed, but I sure have. She's lost weight. A lot of weight. When's the last time you've seen her eating?" They all thought at her comment and all agreed that it had been awhile. It wasn't too unusual because their breaks tended to be scattered, but they remembered the old Sara at least snacking every once in awhile. Catherine was about to speak up again when Sara burst into the room all frantic. There were bags under her eyes – it looked like she hadn't slept in days.

"Sorry I'm late guys. Bad traffic." They all looked at her as she sat down. "What?" She asked, with a frown.

"Is everything okay?" Grissom asked carefully. She looked at him, confused.

"Fine? Why?" She immediately turned her focus onto Catherine, wondering what on earth she had told them.

"You've just been… acting different lately." Nick said quietly. She shook her head, with confusion, wishing to break the awkward silence. Greg had gotten up and went to the fridge and pulled out 2 apples. Grissom watching him, as he resumed his seat beside Sara.

"I don't know what's wrong guys, but don't we have assignments tonight?" She asked, uncomfortable with everyone looking at her. Greg turned to her.

"You want an apple?" he asked, biting into his own.

"No thanks Greg. I'm not hungry. What are you doing here anyways?" Greg looked at Grissom, wondering if he should say something. Grissom just shook his head no, and Greg excused himself back to the lab.

"Okay, what is everyone not telling me?" Sara asked, not understanding why everyone was acting so weird. Deciding not to push any further, Grissom got up and handed out the assignments. He paired her up with Nick, knowing that of all of them, he would keep the closest eye on her. Sara and Nick left first, leaving the rest of them behind, their eyes following her until they couldn't see her no more.

-+-+-

"How about I take you out to breakfast after shift?" Nick asked Sara, trying to coax a smile out of her. She didn't even look at him.

"I don't know Nick, I can't really think about food right now." He glared at her, frustrated with why she was shutting him out. He grabbed her arm and stopped her in the hall. "What?" she asked accusingly. Her anger threw him back slightly but he quickly recovered.

"Sar – what's the matter with you? Why won't you talk to me anymore? I'm not stupid - I know something's wrong and your shutting me and everyone else out!" He was happy that they had only been given a burglary, and nothing too important that they couldn't be late for. Nick wanted answers. She stood, her back against the wall, positioned for a fight.

"What do you mean? Nothings wrong with me!" She started to yell. "It's all of you, you all can't get off my back and just leave me alone!" She stopped as the breath caught in her throat. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the rest of the team leaving the break room, glancing at the scene Sara was making. Nick just kept staring at Sara, as she stayed silent for a few moments. He thought maybe she was thinking up more to say, but he noticed her eyes start to unfocus. Grissom and Catherine were hurrying down the hall to where they were standing, obviously panicked as Sara slumped to the floor, not moving.


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N – wow! I'm just thrilled at the response I've gotten so far! Thank you! I'll update as often as I can! As for Sara getting thinner – no kidding, she's already stick thin on the show (so jealous!) so you can just imagine how emaciated she's looking here in my story._

**Chapter 3:**

Grissom sat in the plastic hospital chair, his glasses off, eyes closed and hands folded in anticipation. He opened his eyes slowly, watching Nick pace back and forth, non stop for the last 2 hours. Catherine and Warrick had already come by and waited for awhile, but couldn't stay. They took over the rape case, and Ecklie had found some of his crew to help out that evening. Nick flat out refused to go anywhere, so Grissom waited it out with him, hoping the doctor would be out soon.

-+-+-

Nick hadn't even noticed the stares of the people working at the crime lab as they quickly wheeled Sara's limp body to the ambulance. For all the dead bodies he had seen, her living one lying there, unmoving, made him feel sicker than he had felt at his first autopsy.

-+-+-

The moment he had seen her start to crumble to the ground, Grissom and Catherine raced over to where she was. Nick stood, frozen in panic.

"Catherine call 911 – NOW!" he directed her as she ran to the nearest phone. People were poking there heads out, to see what the commotion was. "I want everyone back in there rooms and stay there until the coast is clear!" Grissom bent over Sara's body and looked for a pulse. He found one and sighed in relief – it was weak, but present. She was breathing, but it was shallow, and none of his attempts to revive her worked.

"What's wrong with her?" Nick asked him quietly, praying he knew something.

"I don't know Nick. She's breathing but she won't wake up. All we can do is wait for the paramedics now."

-+-+-

A tall man came striding into the waiting room.

"I'm looking for the family of Miss. Sidle?" he asked, looking around at the almost deserted room. Nick shot over to him, Grissom at his heels.

"I'm Gil Grissom. This is Nick Stokes. We're friends with Sara – we brought her in. We're criminalists at the Las Vegas Crime Lab, where Sara works." He nodded.

"I'm Dr. Kyle Ferguson. If you could follow me to my office please?" The both nodded and walked down the sterile halls of the hospital. The doctor both offered them a seat, before taking his own, facing them across his desk. Nick kept wringing his hands in anxiety.

"I can't discuss everything to do with Miss. Sidle's case with you, due to the privacy act but there are a few things I need to know, and I can let you two know. I have called her physician. She's on her way. I've also looked over Sara's history. Before I get into detail, has she informed you at all about any of her hospital visits in the last 6 months?" Nick looked at Grissom, with a look of terror on his face. She hadn't been admitted to the hospital in the last 6 months. Nick, being completely unable to speak, Grissom knew that they were both oblivious to any medical problems Sara might have had.

"We have not been aware that she has been admitted at all? She never said anything." The doctor nodded, a grim look on his face.

"Well, as I'm sure you understand, I can't disclose any of her medical history." Nick couldn't believe his ears. Something was wrong with Sara and the doctor wasn't going to tell them?

"What do you mean – you're not going to tell us! She's my friend I want to know what's wrong!" He said, standing up. Grissom was instantly at his side.

"Nick – the doctor can't violate Sara's rights, as much as we may want to know. It's up to Sara to tell us. Please sit down." Nick looked mutinous, as he slowly took his seat again. "Dr. Ferguson – what can you tell us?" He looked closely at the man.

"Look, believe me when I say I wish I could tell you everything, but I could lose my job and end up in jail. Here's what I can tell you though – Miss. Sidle is in stable condition. She goes in and out of a catatonic state. As to why, well I'll leave it at that. She's conscious now. We've hooked her up to an IV. What I need is some information; just give me the best answers you can get. The more we understand the situation, the better we can help her. When is the last time she's eaten?" Grissom looked at Nick, an look of understanding shooting between them.

"We were discussing that before Sara came into work today. Another friend of ours noticed that she's lost weight and all of us have noticed she barely eats anymore." Nick answered. "Does she have an eating disorder? Is that why she passed out?" Gil knew that Nick was worried, and anxious to find out what was wrong with his friend, and he had to admit, the thought had crossed his mind as well.

"I can't say for sure, but personally – I think it's more of her not taking care of herself over an actual disorder. Forgetting to eat, not eating right, not wanting to eat. Loss of appetite. I've seen it before in these cases. As for the reason she passed out, I think it has a great deal to do with it. As I already said, she has the IV. I want to keep her at least a few days for observation but then she can go home. Our resident psychologist is going to be seeing her in the morning. No work for now and someone must be with her constantly. I also strongly recommend getting her to a therapist." They both nodded.

"I'll take care of her and take her to her appointments with a therapist. Can we see her?" Nick said, without hesitation. The doctor got up and nodded, and shook both men's hands before leading them to her room.

"Remember, she might not be cognitive the whole time, she slips in and out. Don't overwhelm or stress her. I'll keep you informed as to the best I can."

"Thank you doctor." Grissom said, as he stood outside of the door with Nick. He could see that Nick was almost afraid to go in.

"He barely told us anything – we still don't know what's really wrong." He said softly. Grissom nodded.

"But he gave us many clues I think he's hoping we'll decipher. We'll figure it out Nicky. We're criminalists for a reason and I think the doctor took that into consideration." Grissom grasped the handle and strode into the room, Nick right behind him, both taking chairs at either side of Sara's bed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4:**

Nick immediately took Sara's hand. He could feel her weakly squeeze his hand back, but her eyes continued to reject him. They were void and lifeless, staring off into a distant place that held her mind captive. Nick felt the words that he was dying to say catch in his throat. He looked up at Grissom and noticed a look on his face, one he had never seen before. The lines on his face softened, he looked tormented, as tormented as Nick felt inside.

Grissom had never seen Sara look so vulnerable. He remembered walking into the police station when he had been called after her DUI. She had looked defeated, even embarrassed. The ride home had been silent, she could barely meet his eyes for days, but she recovered, she regained her old stubbornness back, something he had come to admire in her. But now, now she looked claimed - taken by something he couldn't name. He saw it in her eyes, the eyes that betrayed her.

"Excuse me, but I need to check Miss. Sidle's blood pressure and pulse. I'll only be a moment." Grissom went to stand up and leave but she stopped him. "No worries, I'll only be a few minutes. You can stay. Has she spoken at all?" Grissom shook his head.

"Has she been speaking at all?" he asked, concernedly. The nurse smiled kindly,

"Only once, but I know the doctor expects a full recovery. Sometimes, in these cases, the victim withdraws but I almost always see them come back. Talk to her, let her know your there. 90 of cases, the patients can still hear you." She smiled again and left.

"Victim?" Nick whispered, as if he didn't want Sara to hear. "Victim of what?"

"I don't know Nick, but we'll find out." He took Sara's other hand and gently held it in his, careful not to disrupt her IV. "Hey Sara. It's Grissom. Nick and I are both here. Just let us know when you want to talk and we'll listen." Nick didn't know what to say. It was hard to imagine her responding, it was like talking to a wall.

"Hey Sara, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere okay? I'm sorry I pushed you to talk when you didn't want to. I just wanted to help." Her eyes stayed blank as Nick fought back the tears of frustration and guilt.

-+-+-

Nick slowly opened his eyes and quickly glanced at Sara. Her eyes were closed peacefully. He glanced over to the other side of the bed, where Catherine was fast asleep; still clinging to Sara's other hand. Grissom had left a few hours previous – there were things he still needed to do at work and he claimed that there was things he needed to figure out about what happened with Sara. Nick refused to leave Sara's side, even to get some sleep or figure out what was wrong in the first place, so Grissom and the rest of the team decided to pull shifts with Nick. Catherine had come a few minutes after Dr. Ferguson had left, checking up on his patient. He had even more information for the CSI's.

-+-+-

"How are you holding up Sara?" Dr. Ferguson asked as he strode into the room. Her mouth didn't move, her eyes didn't even shift from the position they had held for the last 2 hours that Nick and Grissom had been sitting there. "That bad eh?" he responded with a smile as he tried to lighten the dark mood cast in the hospital room. "How are you two doing? You both look dead on your feet."

"We're fine thank you doctor." Grissom responded. Nick cut in quickly,

"She hasn't changed at all in the last 2 hours – is that normal?" Dr. Ferguson nodded.

"Please, call me Kyle. As I said, it comes and goes in these cases. Hey, just a quick question, but does Miss. Sidle get a lot of injuries at work? Bruises and such?" Grissom looked at him, wondering what he meant.

"Not really? I mean you get your occasional bumps and scrapes but…" Dr. Kyle sent him a meaningful look, and Grissom said no more.

"Oh okay, just wondering. Well, I'm hoping that she'll wake out of her current state sometime soon. Just talk to her, pretend like she'll answer. It will do wonders. Other than her unresponsiveness, she's doing better. She's much better nourished and hydrated than when she came in. We'll keep running the IV, but hopefully, physically she'll be on the mend and out of here in a few days." Nick nodded, his eyes flitting back to Sara, as if she would disappear if he didn't look at her.

"Are you her husband?" The doctor asked, with a frown. Nick almost choked and Grissom noticed the momentary look of panic and confusion on his face as he tried to explain.

"No, I'm just…just a friend and co-worker." He finally managed to sputter out. Grissom just raised his eyebrows but said nothing. He was a bit of an idiot when it came to relationships, but you had to be blind not to see how much Nick cared for Sara. The doctor turned again to Grissom.

"Is she seeing anyone? Do you know who her last boyfriend was?" he asked. Again, Grissom looked at him searchingly, wondering what he was trying to say.

"As far as I know she's not seeing anyone right now. Her last boyfriend was, about 3 weeks ago. Didn't really know him that well – all we know about the relationship was that he left her." The doctor didn't look that surprised, like he already knew all this information.

"Okay, well thanks. Take care; make sure you both get sleep too. Have you contacted her family?" Nick answered softly,

"We're her only family." The doctor smiled and said goodbye, telling them he would be back in a few hours to check on her again.

Grissom sat, deep in thought about the conversation with the doctor. It was obvious he was trying to get them to pick up on something, without directly saying anything. He looked at Nick, whose eyes were locked on Sara's. Clearly, he hadn't picked up on the doctor's attempts to explain her condition, being more overwhelmed with Sara than with what the doctor had to say. Instead, once Catherine arrived, they filled her in on Sara's condition, and Grissom hurried off to the lab to start trying to figure out all the clues as to what really happened to Sara.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N – Again, your support is commendable and much appreciated! Just to give you the heads up, I will be away from September 4th-7th, because I am moving back to university to start second year! So, no posts during that time but I will try and get a few more chapters up before then. I would LOVE to see some of the theories in the reviews, see how close or off base you all are :)**

**Chapter 5:**

"Where were we?" Grissom asked, completely bewildered in thought.

"Assignments? Remember?" Catherine asked. The team didn't know what to expect at the beginning of their next shift, being 2 CSI's short – Sara, still in the hospital, Nick constantly at her side. Her psych exam was pushed forward a few more days, in the hope that she would be talking. There was not point having the psychologist come and talk to an unresponsive patient.

"What's happening with the rape case?" Grissom asked Catherine and Warrick. Warrick answered,

"Guy in custody, positive match to the semen from the rape kit. Completely caved when we buried him under the evidence. The victim, 13-year-old girl, is still in hospital. The doctors don't think she'll ever wake up." Catherine just shook her head in sadness.

"Any new cases?" she asked. Grissom looked up at the 4 pairs of eyes staring at him. He had asked Greg and Brass to join them, knowing that they would need Greg's support, even though he was a brand new CSI, and Brass because Grissom wanted to involve him in this case, more-so for personal reasons rather than professional ones.

"Yes. Sara's case."

"What do you mean?" Greg asked with confusion.

"Because Sara hasn't been speaking, we haven't been able to get her to tell us what exactly happened. Now, her doctor can't exactly go spilling her information due to privacy, and doctor-patient privilege. Now I know that he thinks it's important that we know what's going on, probably for Sara's safety and health, so he's almost been dropping hints about things we should look up on."

"What sort of hints?" Brass asked.

"That she's been admitted to the hospital at least once in the last 6 months, that she hasn't been taking care of herself lately, which is part of the reason why she collapsed. He doesn't think it's a disorder, but rather she hasn't bothered or wanted to eat lately. He wants her to see a therapist, so there's obviously something going on, mentally with her."

"Well, the way she had been acting lately, I'm not surprised. Something big must have happened, how did she hide it from all of us?" Catherine asked. Grissom sighed.

"There's more. Before you came in Cath, the doctor came to check on Sara. He dropped some very blatant hints to me. Nick didn't pick up on anything, he's been rather pre-occupied with Sara, but believes me when I say, and he wanted us to know. The nurse also let slip that she was a victim of something, and that in "these" cases, sometimes the "victim" goes into a catatonic state. Dr. Kyle asked if Sara gets a lot of injuries at work. Bruises and cuts. He also brought up her last relationship, wondering when it was, with whom, why it ended, as if it was important but he acted like it was nothing new to him, he just wanted me to say it and figure out that it meant something."

"I bet that bastard Chris did something to her!" Warrick slammed his fists on the table and stood up, livid.

"Warrick – sit down. We can't afford to lose our tempers. I want to figure this out as much as you do! We don't know anything for sure yet, but I think we have a start. I think we need to track down Chris and talk to him. See what we can find out. There's nothing much else we can do until Sara starts talking." Grissom added. They all nodded in agreement.

"What about Nick?" Brass asked quietly. They all knew how hard Nick was taking this.

"I think we should keep this low-key for now. Nicky is already panicked enough as is. He might go tearing after Chris if he learns about any of this," responded Warrick, "What do you think Grissom?" Gil thought for a moment. Either choice had its consequences, but Warrick was right.

"I don't think we should tell Nick about it right now. Don't hide things; just don't bring it up either. Just promise me Warrick, you wont go tearing after him either." Warrick nodded, in defeat and grabbed his things. Soon, only Grissom and Brass were left in the room. Jim walked over to his friend.

"How's she holding up?" he asked quietly. He hadn't had the chance to go see her yet. Over the years, Brass had grown more and more attached to Sara. Her spirit reminded him of his own daughter, one who had estranged him from her life. Sara wouldn't replace her but she always brought that smile to his face, the way Ellie used to. At least, she used to before all of this happened.

"I don't know Jim. " Grissom responded, running his hand through his hair "I've never seen her like this. I think something went seriously wrong, and I can't help but feel a little guilty for not having picked it up sooner, or said something earlier."

"You can't beat yourself up for this Gil. We all noticed the changes in her; she wasn't willing to talk about it. You can only push so far. What's important is we're all here for her now. How's Nick holding up?"

"Not good. I know he's blaming himself for her collapse. He said he had been asking her what was wrong and she just freaked and told him to leave her alone. Then she passed out. He thinks its all his fault, and he won't even leave her side."

They talked a little more, before Brass left to go start seeing what he could find about Chris. Grissom took a deep breath, before heading to his Tahoe, and driving back to the hospital to see if Sara had spoken at all yet.

-+-+-

His eyes ached with exhaustion. Nick could barely focus them anymore. The team had all went back to work, to start the night shift. Grissom said he would be back in a few hours, once he handed out the assignment. Nick hadn't slept since well before Sara had been admitted. The hospital room lights were dim, and Nick could feel his unconsciousness start to seize him. He woke up suddenly when he felt a squeeze of his hand. His eyes immediately fluttered open and looked at Sara, whose eyes were locked on his.

"Sara! Are you okay? Do you need me to get the doctor?"

"I'm fine." She said in a whisper. "What happened?" He held her hand tighter.

"You collapsed at work. I'm so sorry it's all my fault. You've been awake, but not responding. We're all so worried about you." A small smile crept onto her pale face, one dampened by the tiredness and pain in her eyes.

"I'm fine," she repeated. "It's not your fault. I can't really remember anything after going out into the hall with you. You were talking, it all went blank. I can't think, or talk, I know your there. Grissom, Catherine? I don't understand." Nick was having trouble keeping up with what she was trying to say. She was obviously not completely lucid.

"It's okay Sara. I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere okay?" She nodded and closed her eyes. He watched her as she slowly breathed in and out, masked with confusion. Slowly she opened her eyes again. He took a deep breath, not know what would happen,

"Sara – what happened, what made you so upset? Why were you in the hospital before? We want to help you." She opened her mouth a few times and shut it. Tears started streaming down her face. Silence held the room for a few moments, as Sara's eyes, deep in thought, struggled for the words to explain. Unable to bear the stillness any longer, Nick continued in a small, quiet voice,

"Sara, was it that Chris guy?" Immediately her eyes started to go blank. She moved her head and changed her focus to the ceiling. "Sara? SARA?" Nick exclaimed, standing beside her, holding her hand, where her grip had loosened. She didn't respond. She was shutting everything out. Nick didn't know what to do. The tears that had burned so often in the back of his eyes, threatened their release to the surface, as he pounded the call button to inform the nurse what had happened.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N – Well, some of your theories are awesome. Keep them coming – I love to see what you're all thinking. I'm not saying anything though… hehe – I'd rather keep you all in suspense. Thanks for all the support, you guys ROCK. Writing would mean nothing, if it were for you all. This story is dedicated to all of you who support the people whose passion is writing, who encourage, and help us to achieve our dreams._

**Chapter 6:**

"Sara?" The doctor gently shook her arm but spoke forcefully, "Sara can you look at me?" Dr. Ferguson had sat her bed up, in hopes that it would awaken her consciousness better. It hadn't worked. She had talked to Nick for a few moments, but froze up when he had mentioned Chris. Now she was sitting, arms around her knees, rocking back and forth, her eyes averted from any form of life in the room.

Grissom burst into the hospital room, noticing through the window the doctor and nurses crowded around Sara. Nick looked helpless, his eyes red and bloodshot. He rushed over to the bed, and saw her shaking back and forth, unmistakably upset.

"How long has she been like this?" He asked immediately. The doctor looked concerned, at both Sara's condition and Nick's.

"It just happened. Apparently she started talking a bit to her friend there. He said he mentioned the name of her last boyfriend and she went back into her catatonic state. He immediately called us; worried he had done something wrong. I came in, she was unresponsive again. We decided to sit her up, see if we couldn't get her to snap out of it. One of our nurses came in, who has the same name of her last boyfriend. I said her name, and she freaked out again. She's been like this since. Our psychologist is coming in immediately. It's not good for her to be like this..." Grissom nodded, overwhelmed with seeing her look so helpless and scared. He went over to Nick, noticing his need too.

"Nick – calm down. It's okay – you didn't do anything wrong." Nick kept pacing frantically, obviously having a near panic attack.

"I shouldn't have said anything. I mentioned his name and she completely froze up. What DID he do to her?" He slammed his fists against the window. Dr Kyle looked up immediately and strode over to him.

"Mr. Stokes," he said firmly, "I already explained you did nothing wrong. In fact, it was probably good – we know what's setting her off. It's the road to recovery, but I think you need to leave right now and take a walk. Calm down, pull yourself together. She needs your support right now. Dr. Grissom, if you wouldn't mind – I was hoping maybe you could talk to her too, maybe another face would help." Gil nodded, eager to do something for his fallen colleague. He turned to Nick,

"Nicky – go take a walk. Get something to drink. Let me try talking to her – the doctors right, you can't lose it now. Okay?" Nick nodded slowly, in defeat and headed out the door with one last glance at Sara. Grissom quickly strode over to her bed, and sat on the edge. He took her two hands and looked directly at her diverted eyes, noticing her trembling. He could feel the emotion swelling in his chest, emotions he rarely felt and never let show.

" Sara? It's Grissom. You need to listen to me. Can you look at me? Sara – you've got to pull through this, we're all here for you. We all love you and we're not going anywhere, you understand?" He said, in a voice barely higher than a whisper. Slowly, she started to calm down, she wasn't shaking as hard, but still her eyes wouldn't meet his. The nurse and doctor came over. The nurse, Chris, put her hand to her forehead and immediately grabbed her thermometer.

"Doctor – her fever is still very high." She said quietly, as the doctor injected some sedative into her IV. Immediately, Sara started to drift off and her eyes close. The heart rate monitor beeps started to gradually slow down. Grissom let go of her hands and helped the doctor lay her back down on the bed.

"Why does she have a fever?" Grissom asked. Nick still hadn't returned.

"Stress mainly, a few other things I can't discuss. She got herself worked up, and her temperature skyrocketed. I gave her a sedative, hopefully that will help – the psychologist will be here once she wakes up in the morning, and we'll see then what the options are." Grissom resumed his seat next to Sara's bed, exhausted already with the evening's events. He took her hand and closed his eyes, poised for another sleepless night.

-+-+-

"I did a search on Chris Hartman. No priors." Warrick said, almost in a disappointed voice. "We still haven't tracked him down though." Catherine nodded. She had taken the lead on this case, in Grissom's absence. She also had her information to share,

"Greg and I went to Sara's apartment." Brass looked at her, with a weary eye.

"But, you didn't have a warrant?" he interjected.

"Spare key. Nick had it, when I was at the hospital he gave it to me. All we found were a few photos of her and Chris on her table. They were going out, what, 6 weeks? Nothing in particular, just some cute couple shots – nothing that looked out of the ordinary." She paused, "Except this." She held it up for everyone to see. Warrick and Brass both looked stunned, the same way Catherine and Greg had felt when they had first found it in her garbage can.

"You think…?" Warrick stuttered. Catherine sighed in frustration.

"I don't know. It would kind of make sense, but not totally. I still think there's a lot we're missing. I think we need to find this Chris guy. And fast. I'll let Grissom know about the latest developments when I go to the hospital." They all nodded and agreed. Warrick, Brass and Greg all made plans to go see Sara after shift, in the morning, and let Catherine explain it all to Grissom.

-+-+-

"Nick?" Grissom said quietly, as he stared at the man, sitting with his eyes closed against the cold cement wall. He didn't answer for a few moments.

"Have you ever felt like you're trapped and no one can hear you, no matter how loudly you scream? Like you're just lying there alone in the dark, and you just don't know what to do anymore?"

"Nick – I understand you feel frustrated and worried, we all are…" Nick quickly cut in.

"It's more than that Grissom. I feel like I'm suffocating. I can't do anything, and anything I try to do just make things worse. Why did this happen to her? And why didn't I do anything to stop it?" Grissom pitied the man in front of him. He was obviously at his wits end, overtaken by exhaustion; his mind wasn't processing everything rationally. Grissom couldn't blame him for feeling hopeless, not after what he had just seen with Sara.

"Nick, you have to understand you did nothing wrong – we all knew something was up with her. She's settled now. The doctor said her temperature is a bit high, but he gave her a sedative and the psychologist will see her in the morning. She'll get through this. Don't lose hope now – she's strong, and I've never pinned Sara Sidle as a quitter." He nodded and gave his boss a small smile.

"Thanks Grissom." The slowly got up, and made there way back to Sara's room, as Catherine came out of the elevators.

"Hey guys – how's Sara?" Grissom explained everything, as Catherine listened in shock.

"But she's okay now?" Nick nodded, as he continued his way back to the familiar, bland hospital room. Before they stepped inside, Catherine put a hand on Grissom's shoulder.

"Hey Gil – do you think I could talk to you in private for a second, first?" Nick looked at her cautiously. She knew she had to be careful. "It's about a case at work." Nick shrugged and went to see Sara. Grissom looked at Catherine keenly, wondering what this was all about... She filled him in on all the details.

"You sure it was hers?" Catherine nodded solemnly.

"Don't make any assumptions yet, but it would explain a lot."

"We still need to find that Chris guy. Until Sara gets out of this, he's really the only hope we have." Grissom said, as he went to open the hospital door for Catherine, and followed her inside the room.


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N – Well I figured I should post at least one more chapter before I move, so this one may be short and I definitely have plans on leaving it open ended and suspenseful to keep you all on the edge of your seats until I get settled at university! Keep reviewing, it means so much to me to hear you support! And the theories, obviously I'm not going to be saying anything but they are definitely interesting to read!_

**Chapter 7:**

Nick wanted to pace back and forth, but the exhaustion that overtook him made him unable to even stand up for more than a few minutes. Instead he let his mind pace, back and forth between what was happening and what should have happened. He sat with his friends, grateful for their support, but couldn't feel like things we're okay. They weren't okay.

After shift, Brass, Warrick, Catherine and Greg joined Grissom and Nick at the hospital. Before they had time to start talking, the psychologist arrived to examine Sara. They all agreed to wait outside together until they received any news on what was really going on. They had all been filled in on Sara's meltdown, and all of them knew now about what Catherine and Greg had found in her apartment. Everyone, except Nick. Grissom couldn't bring himself to tell the distraught man, and decided that it was just a lot better to leave it be until they knew the whole story first.

The older woman stepped out of the room awhile later, and was quickly surrounded by the group of CSI's awaiting her news.

"I trust you are all friends of Miss Sidle, and co-workers, I believe from what Dr. Ferguson has told me?" Grissom nodded, and extended his hand.

"I'm Gil Grissom, this is Catherine Willows, Nick Stokes, Warrick Brown, Greg Sanders and Jim Brass. We all work with Sara at the Las Vegas Crime Lab."

"Pleasure. I'm Dr. Tyler – I just finished talking with Miss. Sidle and did my overview of her condition, if you all want, we can take a seat in the visitors lounge where we may be a bit more comfortable?" They nodded and followed her to the small, deserted room.

"She talked to you?" Nick asked immediately. Sara hadn't even been awake since her episode hours previous, and had no idea if she would ever talk again after what happened.

"She did." The psychologist responded. "This is now her 3rd time talking, I believe. Which is a good sign. The nurse on staff at the time of her admittance noted in her charts that for a short time when Miss. Sidle first arrived she was cognitive and talking."

"What did she say then?" Catherine asked, with curiosity.

"I'm sorry, ma'am but I'm not at liberty to discuss that. I can't tell you anything about her history, but I can tell you about her current condition. She gave me permission for that." Grissom nodded, happy with any information they could get. The doctor continued,

"As for her condition, I think that she will slowly start getting out of her catatonic state. I'm sure you've all heard that this is not unusual for these circumstances Her episode last night caused her fever to skyrocket, and was hard on her physically but I think it was a starting step to recovery. I want her to keep seeing me, at least for a while. Whilst she's in the hospital, I'll be coming everyday but once she's released, she'll need constant therapy. She will also need stability."

"We can help with that." Nick immediately volunteered, to the agreement of all his friends.

"Good. She's still slipping in and out, and I did have some trouble getting her to focus. When I talked about certain things, she would immediately start to block me out. Now, because of my education and training, I know what to do in these circumstances. Let her talk to you about things, I've told her that she needs to open up to her friends and family so that they can help her recover, which is why she's allowed me to fill you in on all this, however she is still very reluctant to let anyone know about the history."

"We will do whatever it takes," replied Warrick. The doctor smiled,

"I'm glad she's got a firm support system in place. I don't know how alert she'll be right now, I'm sure she's tired after our session and may have slipped out of consciousness again, just to try and block out everything she's feeling. Just talk to her about everyday things, things you know are important to her. Expect her to respond. I'm sure you all want to see her, and I'm certain we will be seeing more of each other, so I won't keep you any longer. If you have any questions or concerns about Sara, please don't hesitate to call me. And, if any of you are struggling with this – I know it can be hard to see a friend or loved one like this, my door is always open."

They all thanked her as she left and they headed back to Sara's room. They all walked in, and noticed that Sara's eyes were off in that far distant place again. Grissom sighed in resignation, having seen this defeat in her already, but registered the shock on the faces of Brass, Warrick and Greg. It was hard to soak in, the deterioration of their friend. They talked with her a bit, visited, but being worn out after their shift, excused themselves to head home and sleep for a few hours. Catherine, Grissom and Nick all stayed. Catherine and Grissom decided to join forces to get Nick home to sleep, eat and shower and finally won. Knowing that he wasn't safe to drive, due to exhaustion, Catherine asked Grissom to drive him home so she could spend some time talking to Sara.

Nick went over and hugged Catherine, just needing that emotional support, knowing that she was the best candidate to give him what he needed then. She had always had his back, always wanted the best for him and always understood him. Grissom was undoubtedly there and supportive, but not in the same way Catherine was. Grissom promised to be back soon thereafter, once he had a chance to eat and shower too. Once they had left, Catherine took the chair next to Sara's bed, poised for a one sided conversation.

-+-+-

"Well, Lindsey's feeling better…" she continued. Twenty minutes and still nothing. She had hoped that maybe another woman talking would help, another face. After what she had found in her apartment, Catherine felt nothing but empathy for her friend. She tried to keep talking, as if everything was normal, but couldn't anymore. Silence overtook the room, silence until she heard the rustling of bed sheets. Sara opened and closed her eyes, only this time to stare straight at Catherine.

"Sara? Can you hear me?" She asked gently.

"I could always hear you Cath, well kind of. It's just, I could never respond sometimes. It doesn't make sense." Sara closed her eyes, trying to sort all the thoughts in her head.

"Sara – it's okay, it doesn't need to make sense right now. How are you feeling?" She shrugged gently, still weak from her collapse.

"I've been better. I'm glad you're here. I need to talk to you." Catherine nodded.

"Anything you need to say, I'm here okay?"

"I couldn't tell the boys, I couldn't even tell you. A doctor came in not that long ago, she told me I needed to talk about it all. That it was the only way. It's so hard to explain Catherine. For so long I just kept ignoring it, filing it away. Now, when it comes up, or I think about it – something happens. It's like someone else takes control of me and I can't stop them. Then I find myself and I can hear people, but I can't feel anything. I can't talk, I can't do anything but helplessly listen."

"It's called a catatonic state, Sara. You keep going in and out. The doctors are trying to help you stop that. Did Dr. Tyler tell you to talk about what happened?" Sara nodded, the tears already streaming down her face.

"But I couldn't tell the boys." She whispered. "I can't tell them. I know they'll find out, I'm sure you guys have been investigating this all like crazy already." Catherine couldn't suppress her smile.

"We just wanted to help you – anything you can tell us will help more."

"Do you remember that guy I was seeing?" Catherine nodded. "Something happened with…Ch…with…with him. I knew he wasn't the best guy, but I had been so lonely for so long. And he was interested. No one is ever interested in me. Things were going good the first few weeks. Then things started to happen. He wasn't who I thought he was." She choked up. Catherine immediately took her hand, knowing what Sara was trying to say, confirming all their theories about him abusing her.

"He hurt you, didn't he?" she asked. Sara nodded.

"No one at work noticed. I didn't want them to notice. It wasn't that bad, it wasn't like how my father used to beat my mother. It was just sometimes he would get angry and lose control." Seizing her chance, Catherine took the little piece of paper out of her purse.

"You are right Sara. We were all so worried about you; we didn't know what to think. So we started to investigate it. There were too many unexplained whys. I went to your apartment, hoping to find some clues as to what was wrong and I found this." She handed the piece of paper to Sara. The tears overwhelmed her vision, but Sara knew exactly what the paper said.

"Do this have anything to do with it?" Catherine asked. Sara nodded again as her cries turned into sobs. Catherine leaned over and hugged her friend, knowing that the next few weeks would be a bumpy ride.

_A/N – well, so much for keeping it short, but here you go. I hope you all enjoyed it so far, more to come after the 7th. Keep the theories coming, now that you know that the thing was a piece of paper. I will tell you this much though, no one has gotten a theory completely yet. Thanks so much, and I look forward to writing more for you guys in a few days, once I'm settled again!_


	8. LETTER

Hey everyone – no I'm sorry but this isn't a chapter. I'm just posting this on all my active stories.

As most of you probably know, I moved to university a few days ago. I am settled in my new place BUT I can't get internet for another two weeks. (I'm at school right now…)

This is what I'm planning on doing – I'm going to write more chapters at home, then put them on disk, then post them up when I can. Now I can't guarantee how often it will be, but I promise I'll try to get more chapters up in this two week period. Then once I have internet at home again, my posts will become more regular!

Thanks so much – you can still R&R, or email me. I check my email every couple of days!

Shellie :)


	9. Chapter 8

A/N – well here's the next chapter! Again, I don't know how long it will be in between them, it's hard because I don't have Internet at home yet. Keep R&R, and I'll post as often as I can, maybe more chapters at once. I'll try and get lots done this weekend!

**Chapter 8:**

Catherine was passed out, her head against the uncomfortable plastic chair she confined. Sara was asleep too, after having talked with her friend for a good hour, getting out a lot more than she had been able to in weeks. There was still a lot she couldn't mention yet, but before she drifted into unconsciousness, she knew that in time she would be able to bring herself to deal with everything.

Warrick and Nick made their way back into the hospital room, ready for a few more silent hours of waiting. They had no idea how much Catherine now knew, and because Catherine had promised to keep some things secret from the men for now, there was much that they wouldn't know for now. She hadn't wanted to keep those secrets, but Sara's pleading eyes begged her to, and she couldn't refuse the request of her weakened friend. Warrick immediately noticed the piece of paper that had floated to the ground by Catherine's foot. Not wanting Nick to see it, he went over to check on Catherine, while discretely picking up the paper and putting it in his pocket.

"What was that?" asked Nick, curiously. Warrick tried to hide his surprise and cover. The last thing they needed was for Nick to find out the little bit of information they had about Sara. Especially when they had been keeping it from him.

"What are you talking about?" He said, as he tried to fake innocence. Nick just shrugged, too tired to argue, and leaned back into his chair. Warrick didn't have the heart to wake Catherine up, but moved her so she was more comfortable, prepared to take her home once she awoke.

-+-+-

A few hours passed, and Catherine finally moved. Warrick and Nick had been busy playing cards, trying to pass the time; Sara was still fast asleep. Finally Catherine stirred, her neck stiff from the makeshift bed she lay upon.

"When did you guys get here?" she asked, still waking up, rubbing her neck.

"About 2 hours ago." She quickly sat up and demanded,

"And you didn't wake me?" Warrick gave her a small smile.

"You looked so tired, we couldn't. Don't worry – you didn't say anything in your sleep." He winked at her and she couldn't help but grin. On a more serious note, he then asked, "Did Sara talk at all?" Nick quickly focused on her, poised for her answer, hopefully of good news. She nodded and Nick smiled for one of the first time in days.

"Really?" He asked excitedly, "What did she say?" Catherine took a deep breath.

"She told me a lot actually…" she started. Nick's grin was undeniable. Catherine couldn't help but feel sorry for him, and a little guilty for the secrets she needed to hide.

"And?" he said quickly, the smile still radiating from his tired face. Before Catherine could start, she noticed Sara's eyes on Nick's.

"If you don't mind Cath, I think I tell Nick myself." Catherine smiled and nodded as Nick almost jumped onto her bed hugging her. Even Sara couldn't suppress the small grin at Nick's absolute elation. Warrick smiled at her, understandingly that she wanted to tell Nick herself. Not wanting him to feel left out she said softly,

"It's good to see you too Warrick." He smiled gently, before bending down to kiss her on the forehead.

"It's great to see you too. I'm so glad you're okay girl. We'll let you two talk…" Catherine bent over and hugged her friend too.

"Cath will be filling you all in anyways about some things I told her, I just think I want to explain to Nick myself." Warrick nodded, completely accepting that this was important to her. They said their goodbyes and soon left to the crime lab to fill in the rest of the team. Nick and Sara sat in silence for a few moments. Nick couldn't suppress how happy he felt that she was awake, but was reluctant to bring anything up. He didn't want an episode like last time again.

"Nick?" She whispered quietly. He looked at her intently, his eyes moist with the tears reflected in her eyes.

"I was so scared Sara. I'm so sorry. It's my fault – please just tell me you're okay."

"It's not your fault Nick. You didn't do anything wrong. You think you said a lot, you should've been in here when the shrink was here." She said, trying to joke and coax a smile out of him. "I'm okay, but I know things will get better. I talked to Catherine about Ch… about Chr... Ch…" she kept trying to say his name, but the tears would well up in her eyes when the memories started to flood back. He put his finger on her lips to silence her, and took her hand.

"It's okay, it doesn't matter – we can talk about it later." Sara noticed the fear in his eyes, the terror that she might slip away from him again. She shook her head

"No, Nick. I need to talk about it – I can't keep hiding. But you have to promise me. You have to promise me you won't do anything you'll regret. Please?" Her frail eyes pleaded to him. She knew that he would be furious with what she was going to tell him. She also knew that those few things she had told Catherine would've torn him and the rest of the team up even more. It was best that that information was kept secret until she had more time to deal with it herself.

"I promise Sara. I'll do anything." He squeezed her hand and gave her a weak smile. Sara was a little taken a back at what she saw in his eyes. Something she had never seen before from anyone. She took a deep breath,

"I started seeing someone about 2 months ago. You know who." He nodded, noticing that she was still having troubles saying his name. "Things started out okay, I mean I knew he wasn't a real winner but for once I felt like someone actually cared for me, and it had been so long since I had felt like that." The tears of anguish flowed down Sara's face. Nick knew about her family history and her obvious lack of affection and attention during her childhood. Despite all that, he had always been amazed at how well she had turned out. He reached out and wiped away her tears, broken inside, wishing he could tell her how much he cared, but not wanting her to deal with more than she already was. She continued on,

"Everything was fine until after about a week and a half when I was suddenly called into work when we had that big murder case. I had prepared a nice dinner for us. I had some things we needed to talk about. He arrived; everything was okay. About half way though, Grissom called me in. I told him what I wanted to say. He wasn't happy with the information, or the fact that I suddenly had to leave. He got so angry at me." Nick already knew what was coming.

"He hit you, didn't he?" he said quietly, the fury rising up in his chest. She nodded as the tears continued to flow down her pale face.

"No one noticed. Nick you promised me you wouldn't go after him. Just let it go - I don't want to deal with it anymore, I just want to move on and forget it all. Please." She could see how angry he was, but the moment he looked into her eyes, he nodded.

"Only if he never goes near you again. Are you sure you don't want to press charges? We could get this guy Sar." She shook her head.

"I have my reasons." Nick looked at her questionably, but knew it was a subject that he couldn't broach…for now.


	10. Chapter 9

A/N – Well, I FINALLY got my Internet at home, and I thought I would celebrate by posting another chapter…hopefully they'll be more regular now :)

**Chapter 9:**

"She told you all that?" Grissom asked, astonished at the information Catherine was relaying. She bit her lip, thinking about everything else she knew, understanding more and more Sara's reasons for keeping it hidden.

"She's doing a lot better; She's still having trouble saying his name, and obviously there's a lot she dealing with too. I mean we all know the abusive childhood she had. It'll take some time for her to completely heal, but the doctor expects we should have our Sara back relatively soon." Everyone smiled, happy that things we're looking up for their friend, Catherine still grieving inside for what she knew, knowing that it would take Sara's whole life to get over everything that had happened.

"Anything else we should know, minus the fact that that Chris guy needs a serious ass-kicking?" Greg said. Grissom gave him a look, but he just shrugged. Everyone else was pissed at Chris anyways – if he had any sense, he would never show his face to any of them, unless he wanted some serious problems. They wanted to respect Sara's wishes to leave him be, for her "unknown" reasons, but even in Grissom's heart, he knew how much he wanted to do something more to the jerk than just let him walk free with a slap on the wrist.

"Sara doesn't want to press charges against him for hitting her. She's also going to be seeing a nutritionist – trying to get that back under control. Apparently it had been almost 2 days since she had last eaten, the day she passed out. She told me that she just wouldn't remember to eat and just never felt hungry enough. The therapist wants to keep seeing her, but, if nothing else goes wrong, she could be back within two weeks. I think she might even be released in the next few days." Catherine added.

"She shouldn't be left alone though…" Grissom started. Warrick quickly intervened, after noticing the meaningful look Grissom was throwing at Catherine.

"I think Nick's got that covered." He said with a small smile. Brass spoke up,

"He's still at the hospital?" Catherine nodded,

"Sara wanted to talk to him alone and explain what had happened."

"What about that whole piece of paper in the waste bin thing still hasn't been explained. The note that Chris left inferred a lot more than that he was just mistreating her. It made it sound like Sara had been hiding something from him." Catherine quickly started to break off Grissom's train of thought,

"I'm sure we were just…"

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and Jackie poked her head into the room.

"Sorry to interrupt," she started. "But Mr. Grissom – there's a visitor here for you." Grissom sighed. The sheriff had said he had wanted a word with him about their last case. He always did this when Grissom would avoid him, popping in when he knew he couldn't worm his way out.

"Send him in," Jackie nodded and smiled. The rest of the crew looked at him hesitantly. He glanced quickly at the door.

"Stay so the sheriff won't bug me long – make him think we're working." They all sat back down and started filing through their papers. Grissom looked up at the man standing in the doorway, standing a little in front of Jackie.

"Mr. Grissom is right in here sir," she said as he stepped into the room. Grissom stared at him, and once everyone else noticed his presence, all hell broke loose.

-+-+-

"You're not mad at me?" Sara asked hesitantly, breaking the silence that had filled her hospital room. Nick looked at her, astonished,

"Mad at you – of course not? Why would I be mad at you?" He asked tenderly, taking her hand in his.

"Because I didn't tell you what was going on. I knew you didn't like Chris from the start – I should've trusted your judgment. Because I got angry at you for interfering the day I passed out. Because now," she started to cry, "you've sat for days in a hospital room with someone who barely knows why she gets out of bed anymore." She continued to sob as Nick held her close.

"Sara, I'm not angry at you. I promise. I wish you would've told me sooner, so I could've helped you, but we can't change the fact. So I'm here now. I'm going to help you now. I don't regret staying here with you the last few days. If you're here, it's where I want to be. You're going to get through this and I'm going to be by your side the whole time, if you want me to be."

"Are you sure?" Nick nodded and smiled at the brief look of surprise on her face. He leaned and kissed her on the cheek.

"Yup. Positive. Now, Dr. Ferguson doesn't want you staying alone, at least for a little while. So what do you think about me moving in?" Again her eyes widened.

"Nick – are you sure? Are you saying you want to live with me?" She had a small little grin. It made Nick's smile even bigger, happy that she was starting to sound like her old self.

"That's right. So what do you think? Ready for a roommate? Come on, it will be fun." She rolled her eyes.

"Nick – you don't have to…" her cheerful face suddenly dulled to seriousness.

"Sara, come on. We've been buds for how long now. I want to take care of you. End of story okay?" She nodded, her eyes droopy with exhaustion. "You're tired honey, I'll let you sleep. Sooner than you know it, you'll be back home in your own bed." She whispered back,

"Nick…would you um, mind, just staying for a few moments until I fall asleep?" He looked at her slightly concerned at the look of fear in her eyes. He could see her struggling, and her pain. It broke his heart.

"Of course. I won't go anywhere. Is everything okay?" She didn't respond. His heart stopped. "Sara? SARA?" He got up quickly and took her hands, praying that she wasn't slipping away again. She had been cognitive for so long. He touched her cheek, saying her name again, trying to get her to look at him.

"I just want you to stay until I fall asleep, maybe it will keep the nightmares of them away." Nick sighed in relief as she looked at him with pained eyes. Suddenly it hit him,

"Them?" he asked as he took his seat next to her again. A look of panic flitted across her eyes.

"Him, I meant. Him. Isn't that what I said?" He looked at her, curiously, but still grateful that she hadn't gone catatonic on him again.

"You said them, but I'm sure it was just because you're tired." She nodded and squeezed his hand, as she closed her eyes. Without opening them she said softly,

"Thanks Nick. Make sure you get some sleep too okay?" He smiled at the concern in her voice for his well being,

"I will Sara, don't worry – just get a good sleep."

"Nick?" she said again, in a voice barely higher than a whisper, this time her eyes focused on his.

"Yeah? What is it sweetie?" He said, leaning over and softly caressing her cheek.

"Thanks – for everything. I love you." He kissed her on the forehead.

"I love you too Sar. Goodnight." Her eyes closed peacefully as she drifted off. Nick's heart was racing. He knew it wasn't a declaration of love she had given him. It was more showing how deep their relationship was, and how she felt about their friendship. Still, it made Nick's heart leap with joy to hear it.


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10:**

"What on the hell did you think you were doing walking in here?" Grissom demanded of the stranger that had darkened their doorstep. Warrick and Greg were both starting to show some nice bruises forming on their faces, Catherine a few on her arms as well as many scratches, but Chris, sporting a bleeding lip and swollen eye, sat dignified at the commotion he had caused.

-+-+-

The moment Grissom had seen him walk in he froze. Half of him could barely believe that he had showed up, knowing full well the consequences. It took a moment for the others to see him. They seemed locked into their seats for a few seconds when, surprisingly, Catherine jumped up and stormed over to him.

"Get the hell out of here you bastard!" she yelled into his face. He grabbed her arm to push her back and she lost it and started to hit and shove him. Before Grissom knew it, Warrick was pulling Catherine off Chris, wrestled on the ground when Greg decided he was going to get his share of the fight too, for what he did to Sara. Somehow Warrick ended up in the brawl as well, half trying to get Catherine out, half pummeling the bastard for hurting his friend. Grissom finally regained control when Brass walked in, stunned at the scene before him.

After a few moments to cool off, they were sitting in their chairs, nursing their injuries and staring at their unwelcome guest.

-+-+-

"What do you want?" Grissom said again, staring at the man, wishing he could wipe off the smug grin on his face.

"You know I could charge you all for what you did." Brass chuckled.

"Uh huh, sure buddy. Lets get one thing straight." His face went dead serious as he walked over to the man and stared right into his cold eyes. "You think about pressing charges, we hang you out to dry for everything we can find on you, and we already have quite the record. You don't show up here anymore, and most importantly you stay away from Sara. You understand?" Brass's tactics of intimidation didn't seem to be working.

"Ah dear Sara. Who said I did anything wrong?"

"She did." Grissom responded. He grinned even more, Catherine knowing the weapon he held, praying he wouldn't use it.

"Hmm. Then why isn't she pressing charges?" Silence followed.

"That's none of your business. One last time – what do you want?"

"I came to see Sara." Warrick's already bruised hands started to ball up into fists. Obviously, he hadn't heard about her episode, and that she was still at the hospital.

"She's not available." Greg said, glaring murderously at Chris. "Just leave her alone."

"I'm free to do what I want. When you see her, let her know that I want to talk to her right away. There are a few things we need to take care of." With that he walked out the door, 5 pairs of eyes following his steps.

"What was that about?" Warrick asked half angry, half confused.

"I think the more important question is what are we going to do about him? He's not going to leave Sara alone and if he learns that she's been in the hospital and goes to see her, who knows what the effects could be on her." Greg replied, obviously worried. Grissom looked over at Catherine, who seemed rather pre-occupied by one of her new cuts on her arm.

"Everything okay Catherine?" Grissom asked, concerned at her silence.

"Yeah fine," was all she replied. Silence invaded the room, as they all watched Catherine purposefully not meet any of their gazes. Bewildered, Warrick piped up,

"Catherine – what's up? What do you think we should do?" She sighed and finally looked up, speaking rather forcefully,

"Look - here's what I think. Sara has a reason for not wanting to press charges. I think we should leave it be. Nick is going to be staying with Sara – she's hardly ever alone, and the hospital knows to be careful whom to admit to see her. When she's released in a few days, Nick will watch her during the day, and during night shift she'll either be sleeping, or knowing her, she'll somehow find a way back to work – even if its just a desk job for now. I think you all need to trust her judgment on this and let her be." With that, she got up and left. Looking emotional, they watched her as she headed down the hallway, in the direction on the woman's washrooms.

"What was that all about?" Brass asked the other men in the room, all as confused as he was.

"She's hiding something about what happened with Sara." Grissom responded quietly. "It must be for Sara's good – it's not like Catherine to be like this, unless it was really important."

"But the question is, what if this Chris guy did something worse, and the reason Sara doesn't want to press charges is because she's afraid? And Catherine understands what a fragile state she's in already, she's not willing to sacrifice Sara's mental health for it?" Warrick suggested. "I mean, ever since we found the note, we've suspected something more. I don't think we should just let it go so lightly. Who knows what this guy could do next."

"I have to say boss, I agree with Warrick…" Greg said as Grissom sat in thought.

"Agree with what?" said a voice from the doorway. Nick walked into the break room, with a small smile on his face, though slightly masked with curiosity.

"Nick!" They all greeted him warmly.

"How's Sara doing?" Brass asked immediately, as Nick took a chair.

"She's doing pretty good actually, considering. We talked about what happened. I assume you all know about Chris and what he did by now." They nodded solemnly. Grissom couldn't decide whether or not to tell Nick that Sara's ex had already paid them a little visit. Instead, he asked,

"What did the doctor's say?"

"Well, they think she should be well enough, physically to head home in about 2 days. I'm going to move into her apartment for now. No work for a while, though I'm sure she'll somehow worm her way in. I'll just keep an eye on her during the day, and at night I'm going to talk to the landlord to make sure anyone with Chris's description isn't let into the building, and see if we can't beef up the security. She's adamant about not pressing charges, but he hasn't shown his face so far, so maybe he'll just leave her alone from now on." Greg looked over at Grissom hesitantly.

"Well, make sure you don't give him a reason to show up Nick." He chuckled, though sadly.

"Don't worry Gris. Sara already made me promise not to go after the guy. Anyways, I should go. I'll be in for work tomorrow, though. Thanks for the time off…" he trailed off, realizing that he never had actually asked for any time off, but rather had taken the last couple of days unexpectedly.

"No problem, nothing big has happened anyways, and we've had someone from day shift switch over at least for the next couple of weeks to help while Sara's gone." Grissom answered. Nick looked around, and his brow furrowed,

"Where's Catherine?" he asked. Grissom knew that hiding more about Chris from Nick could end up backfiring, but he also knew that if they had any plans to search more into Chris's history, if Nick ever did find out about the letter or his visit, their chances of catching him eventually would diminish substantially.

"I'm right here." She said quietly from the doorway. Nick went over and gave his friend a quick hug, his smile still in place, but dimmed once he saw her red and teary eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked. Catherine glanced casually at Grissom and noticed his look. A look telling her not to say a thing about Chris to Nick, not that she was going to anyways.

"Oh nothing – just girl stuff." Warrick couldn't take his eyes off the obviously upset Catherine, who stood quietly in the doorway as Nick said his goodbyes again and left to head home, pack, shower and sleep a bit before taking some of his stuff over to Sara's.

"Well, if you don't mind, I think I'm going to head over and see Sara for a bit. Call me if anything comes up and you need my help, I just don't think she should be alone right now." Grissom nodded and she turned to leave without another word. Warrick quickly got up and followed her down the hall, meeting her alone in the locker room.

"Hey Cath! Cath!" He called as she opened up her locker to grab her things.

"What?" she asked, not looking at him.

"Come on girl – what's the matter? And don't say nothing – I know you better than that." She turned to look at him, and the concern in his eyes. The tears started to well up in her own eyes and she just sat on the bench and cried. Warrick wrapped his arm around her and just let her cry it out for a few minutes.

"Better?" She nodded.

"Thanks."

"You want to talk about it?" She sighed.

"I can't."

"Look – I figured it's about Sara. And I respect her privacy and whatever secret you need to keep for her. I don't want to know what it is, if Sara doesn't think I need to hear it, but know that we have Sara's best interests at heart, and we're all really worried about this Chris guy. The note, his visit… Sara's a really strong girl, and something must have pushed her really far to end up like this. I never thought of her as the girl who would passively take to someone hitting her." Catherine sat in silence, soaking up the words.

"I can't say anything Warrick…"

"I know – just, be there for Sara. Help her recover. Help Nick too – He's in the dark about all of this more than any of us are. He still doesn't know about the note or that Chris came this afternoon. Tell me this though – I know Grissom wants to look more into Chris's history, and more about what happened. If Sara wasn't your friend – if she was just another victim that we had to see, would you go after him and look a bit further into what happened?" She remained still for a while, until she gave a slow nod, her eyes downcast.

"I told her she should do something, but she doesn't want to. Half of me understands why. It's such a hard situation Warrick."

"I know – just, stay out of the investigation. What you don't know, you can't feel like you broke your word to Sara. Just concentrate on her for a bit okay? And take care of yourself. We don't need anything happening to you either." She gave him a small smile, and he leaned over and kissed her forehead.

"Thanks Warrick."

"Anytime," he replied as he headed back out the door to talk to Grissom.


	12. Chapter 11

_A/N: Here's my answer to icklebitodd's question (also posted in reviews):_

_Your not actually lost at all. Hehehe...Sara said ALOT of things to Catherine, MANY of them we don't know yet. For some "reason" there are some things that Sara doesn't want anyone to know, you readers included, at least for now. She told Catherine, feeling like she had to tell SOMEONE or else it would eat her up inside, and also knowing that she was the best candidate. As much as she obviously is very close to Nick, there are something's when it comes to women that are much better just to tell another woman. _

_As for the note...well...I guess you can all assume something's it said already but as to what else, that's for me to know for now, and the rest of you to wait! Let your imaginations soar, see what you come up with – here's a bit of a hint though - I've left some clues around as to what it would be. Some more obvious that others, unless maybe their just obvious to me lol._

_Keep your predictions coming - it really helps me shape the story better and understand my readers!_

_Hope that's clears things up – any other questions let me know! Sorry for the delay in update, things at my place at university went a little messy and I haven't really felt like writing the last few days…Being kicked out by my grandparents set me back a little bit emotionally lol…_

**Chapter 11:**

"I talked to Catherine in the locker room." Warrick announced. Grissom looked up from his papers, as Warrick quickly went to shut the office door to avoid anyone overhearing.

"And?"

"She is hiding something. Something she promised not to tell, but she did tell me, in so many words, that if this wasn't Sara and she wasn't bound to secrecy, she would investigate more into Chris." Grissom sat deep in thought. After a few moments of silence, Warrick continued. "I told Catherine that we would start investigating him, and that she and Nick should stay out of it – Catherine so she doesn't break her word to Sara, Nick because he just doesn't need to know right now."

"It must be something really big that she's hiding. It had to have taken a lot to push Sara off the edge." Gil responded quietly. Warrick nodded.

"I'm worried about Catherine too – you can tell this secret is really bothering her. There is something we're missing."

"There is a lot were missing – I think we need to go over that note again, and start researching into Chris Hartman's past. Why don't you take Greg and see what you can find. Brass might even be able to wrangle a warrant to search his apartment. I'll start going over the note again. It might be a good idea to check out Sara's place again too."

-+-+-

Sara walked slowly back into her apartment, Nick close behind holding her bag. She stopped in the doorway, hesitating to go inside. Nick was instantly at her side, her bag lying on the floor.

"Sara? What's the matter?" he asked urgently. She just closed her eyes and shook her head.

"Nothing – its okay." She replied quietly.

"It's not nothing – you're shaking. Do you want to sit down?" She nodded. Nick put his arm around her and led her to the couch. She lowered herself and closed her eyes as Nick grabbed her things from the hall and locked her door. He gently took the seat beside her, as she leaned and rested her head on his shoulder, cuddled up next to him.

"What's the matter?" he asked softly.

"Memories," was all she replied back.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Sara sighed again. The doctors told her time and time again how important it was to express her emotions, talk about what happened. They knew that there was plenty she wasn't telling her friends, and she had requested that they not disclose any of her personal information prior to her collapse. She did, however, tell Catherine. Her psychologist agreed that was a good step, if not telling everyone at least talking to someone she knew she could trust and who would understand. Sara just prayed they would leave Chris alone, so the rest of the team would not discover the horrible truths of what happened.

"I was just remembering the last time, he was here." Nick's fists started to ball up. When he had moved most of his stuff into her apartment, he had gone through the place to make sure every reminder of Chris would be gone. The pictures that had been lying on the counter were ripped into the garbage, phone messages erased. He didn't want anyone to haunt her thoughts ever again, especially Chris Hartman. Sara could tell as she leaned against him how tense he had become at the mention of 'him'. "Nick?" she whispered.

"What is it sweetie?"

"You want me to press charges don't you?" It was Nick's turn to sigh. She lifted her head and turned to look at him. He noticed how emaciated and pale her face still looked. A hurt beyond her eyes hit him, a scar that ran deep but not evident on the surface. The doctors had released her early, at her request, knowing how cooped up she had been feeling. Since physically she was healing, and mentally she was still seeing her therapist, they found no reason to keep her, as long as she wasn't alone for long periods of time. Nick had no intentions of letting her out of his sight; at best he could help it. The only times she would be alone was at night when he was at work, when hopefully she would be asleep.

Nick had approached Sara's landlord about the need for better security, and he had gratefully complied. They installed cameras everywhere, as well as more secure locks all over the building; they fit Sara's locks with new keys. It would be immensely difficult for anyone unwanted to enter. Nick had also spoken to the other tenants and shown them Chris's picture, as to alert them not to let him in.

"To be honest Sara," Nick answered, "I don't completely understand why you don't want to. He hurt you, and you deserve justice for it. What if he starts abusing someone else?" She was silent. Didn't he realize that she tortured herself with the same questions all the time? Then again Nick didn't know the whole story. Once Catherine found out, even she understood her reasoning.

"It's hard to explain Nick but I don't want this hanging over my head forever." It looked like Nick didn't believe her explanation. Either that, or he doubted her decision. Sara couldn't blame him – he was right.


	13. Chapter 12

_**A/N – well, I am just absolutely floored at the feedback I've gotten on this story – thank you! I'm trying really hard to make this my top priority (outside of school and work lol). Who knows what I'll be able to cook up next! Keep reviewing, commenting – any feedback only makes me a better writer – whether positive or negative. (Not negative…constructive lol) By the way, 'words in single apostrophes and italics' mean that the character is thinking. **_

_**-+-+-**_

**Chapter 12**:

Grissom sat in silence, the buzz of the lights overhead driving into his occupied mind. He tried blanked out his surroundings, wanting not to notice the people whizzing by outside his closed door, struggling to ignore the feelings that there was something else he needed to do, attempting to disregard the exhaustion and horror he felt inside. Instead he sat, trying to focus on the piece of paper in front of him. He needed to. For Sara. His purpose revealed, silence came, and he was alone with his thoughts. He examined the note - word for word, sentence-by-sentence, oblivious to the world outside.

_- Sara, you tell me this and then you leave? _

'_Tell him what_?' Grissom thought desperately. '_What did you tell him? Were you going to leave him? Where did you go? Think. She had to leave suddenly, that day a few weeks ago when we had that case. I called her in – she had plans and was reluctant to break them. Not like her. What did she tell me on the phone? Something about needing to talk to him – maybe that's when she left. She told him something, and then she had to go but it was so important she got it over with first.'_ His brow furrowed. The possibilities were endless – Chris could have written this note anytime, but somehow, he felt that this note tied everything together, the one clue they had to solve what really happened. He moved onto the next line.

_- You can't think that I'm happy about this – you are a slut and a liar._

This line made him angry. Of all things Sara needed a life outside of work, and was in no way a woman who took relationships lightly nor was one to spout off lies. '_He wasn't happy with what she told him, using his anger to call her names. She did something to make him upset and he really was not pleased with her about it – she hid something from him, which is why he calls her a liar. Was she seeing someone else too? That's not like Sara. Slut might have been the limit of his vocabulary in an effort to bring her down.'_ One of the things Grissom absolutely hated was a man who would beat a woman. He wasn't an expert when it came to relationships but he knew that no one deserved that kind of treatment, no matter what they did. He could feel his pulse rising as the anger surged through his veins. It wasn't a man who had just beaten a woman, something that caused him enough anguish already. It was a man who had beaten a friend of his, someone he had grown to care about and respect. A man he was going to make pay for his mistakes. More sure than ever that he was doing the right thing by investigating Chris, he carried on:

_- You spout off any of my secrets, more little accidents with happen, I assure you. _

The note seemed to escalate, and Grissom could feel the hatred written with each letter. But why hadn't Sara approached them? If someone were hurting her, she would've been the first person to come forward and set him straight. '_Maybe I don't know her as well as I thought._' Grissom though pathetically to himself, feeling more and more defeated. '_Still, he has secrets too and he was hurting her. The key to it all is what was she hiding from him? Not just him, everyone else too. Was it the piece of information Catherine knew?' _Finally the last line caught his attention.

_- You won't…_

There was a sudden knock at the door and Grissom broke out of his reverie.

"Greg?" he said, confused. "What's up?" Greg hesitated at the door. It wasn't like him, and Grissom started to get worried at his silence. "Is it Sara? Is she okay?" He said quickly getting up.

"No, no – she's fine as far as I know." Grissom's heart was racing at the scare. Still, something wasn't right. Greg continued. "Well, actually, it is about Sara but it's not what you think." He closed the office door and sat down, placing the papers on the desk. Greg started,

"I was going through some files of solved cases a few minutes ago. I found something… interesting. You remember that recent rape case – the 13-year-old girl?" Grissom nodded. "Well, the guy we caught – his name was Josh Whitman. The name sounded familiar, so I looked him up. You'll never guess who he's friends with and where I heard his name."

"Chris," was all Grissom said.

"Bingo – Sara mentioned his name about 2 months ago. Something about all going out together, and I heard her saying Josh Whitman on the phone. So, I did a little more digging. Chris has been to see Josh since he was arrested on the rape case last week. A case Sara wasn't working on until…" Grissom cut in.

"Until Catherine asked her to do the rape kit for her, because Lindsey was sick." Greg nodded, visibly upset.

"I thought you should know. Have you figured out the note yet? Warrick and I have been busy looking up more on Chris, but other than what I just told you, nothing else has surfaced. Brass is still trying to get a warrant." Greg added.

"I've still got some work to do on this note. Bottom-line what I think so far? She hid something from him; she told him but then had to go to work. He hurt her, and threatened to do so again. Whether he did, I don't know. He's also got some secrets other than just the abuse he was inflicting. We need to get this guy." Greg excused himself to go find Warrick again and keep working.

Grissom read over the last line of the note - over and over and over. He wished he could just make this all come together, for Sara's sake. At least they had a lead.

-+-+-

"Are you sure that you'll be okay while I'm at work?" Nick asked one last time. The whole day they had spent on the couch, just in each other's company, with the exception of her counseling session. Nick needed to head to work for the night shift, but was reluctant to leave Sara all alone. Most of his things had been moved into her apartment, and the living arrangements seemed to be working out. Sara was quiet and reserved, obviously still processing the last few days. Nick tried not to worry, but couldn't help it – not after what he had witnessed from her.

"I'll be fine Nick. I'm tired, I'm just going to go to bed – and when I wake up, you should be at home. I won't go anywhere or open up the door to anyone." He nodded but gave her one last look of uncertainty. "Go – you'll be late." She gave him a weak smile that melted his heart. He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. She leaned into him, and suddenly he was standing at the door just holding her. She seemed to just crumble in his arms, needing his support. He loved the feeling of her next to him and prayed that some way he could help her return to her normal self. A few minutes passed and she broke free from his embrace. The tears were running down her face.

"I can call in sick." He said quickly. She shook her head.

"No, no. Go – I'll be fine." He looked at her skeptically, but agreed, knowing that he had taken a lot of time off already, time he had never asked for. They were already short one CSI.

"I'll call in about an hour okay – my phone will be on." He kissed her on the cheek again and made his way out, making sure to lock the various bolts on the door. Sara leaned against the locked door and sighed. Half of her was so happy that Nick was taking care of her. She could feel how much he loved her. But the other half doubted. She felt as if she was taking advantage of him, which is something she didn't want. All her friends were so worried about her, and there was so much she was hiding from them.

'_I told Catherine_.' she thought to herself. '_Even she understood why I wanted to keep it secret, and not press charges._' She went into the bathroom to run some water into the tub and relax before another restless night of nightmares. She looked into the mirror and saw the bruises that still masked her skin. She wrapped her arms tightly around her stomach and let the tears fall. 'One step at a time,' she thought. 'One step at a time.'


	14. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**:

Nick caught up to Grissom in the break room, pouring another cup of coffee.

"Hey Gil!" he said. Grissom turned around,

"Hey Nick – how are you doing? How's Sara?" Nick gave a small, attempt at a reassuring smile.

"She's doing okay. Still upset, but hopefully she'll just sleep tonight. She knows not to open up the door to anyone." Grissom nodded. Nick looked at him curiously. "You know, shift just started – you look like you haven't been home in days. How long have you been here?"

"I've just been working on a few cases." Nick looked at him suspiciously but left it at that as Grissom almost drained his cup of coffee.

"So where is everyone? What cases have we got?" Nick asked as he sat down. Catherine walked in before Grissom could answer. Once Catherine had finished asking about Sara, they both turned to look at their supervisor.

"You two will be working together – DB out in the desert." Nick nodded.

"Where's Warrick?" Grissom cast Catherine a quick, but meaningful glance.

"He and Greg are working on another case – they're out right now with Brass." Catherine knew which case Grissom was talking about. Sara's case. She had no idea where they were however, after deciding to stay out of the whole deal. She was too personally involved. They gathered their things and started to leave when Nick turned around.

"Hey Gil – which case are you working?" He asked out of curiosity. Catherine stared at Grissom. How long could they hide everything from Nick? He would have to find out at some point, and when he did – who knows how he would react.

"I have a lot of paperwork to catch up on, and I'll be backup incase anyone else needs me. We still have that girl from Days helping out. Katrina – she's working a simple burglary. I told her if she needs my help I'll be around." Nick seemed content with this answer.

"Well, I told Sara to call my cell if she needs anything, but at least someone will be around here just in case…" He walked out the room, as Grissom sighed. Catherine watched him for a few moments, comprehension shooting between their eyes – words without sound, before she followed Nick out the door. Grissom made his way over to his office. He did have a lot of paperwork to go through. He wanted to go over the rape case again, read through the note again – he would go insane before he let this case go.

-+-+-

Sara curled up on the couch in a warm blanket, and popped in a movie. Half asleep, but to comfortable to move, she half slept, half watched. She didn't want to miss Nick's phone call. She wished he would sleep beside her, help chase her nightmares away, but she couldn't expect that of him. He was doing enough for her. Still, just hearing his voice before her unconscious claimed her might help. Precisely at that moment, the phone rang. She picked it up without hesitation.

"Hello." She said quietly, expecting to hear that familiar Texan voice greet her back.

"Where the hell have you been bitch?" Her insides froze. She could feel herself trembling, but unable to move.

"What do you want?" she whispered.

"I've been looking for you everywhere – why haven't you contacted me? I left 5 messages and I even went to your work. Your friends wouldn't tell me where you went. Don't play games with me Sara." His voice was dangerous. Sara prayed that this was just a joke. He was going to haunt her the rest of her life. And she was terrified.

"Please – please, just leave me alone." She begged. This only incensed him more.

"It's too late for that. Don't pull a stunt like that ever again – you hear me?" She heard the click on his end and sat there in a trance for a few moments. Her hands were trembling so bad she could barely put the phone back into the cradle. Immediately she dialed Nick's cell number. No response. Who knows where he could be – she had been on a case many times where there was no reception.

There wasn't any time, however, to waste. She felt alone and scared. She feared for her life knowing what he could do to her. She ran into her bedroom and threw some clothes on, before grabbing her purse and running out the door to her SUV.

-+-+-

"Shoot. No signal." Nick announced. Catherine glanced at him as she was driving. His face was panicked.

"It's the desert Nick – we always lose reception out here."

"I promised Sara I would call." Catherine sat and contemplated for a few moments, but after noticing how worried Nick was, she made an unexpected turn. Nick just looked at her.

"You want reception – we'll find you some reception. Let me know when to stop – that dead body isn't going anywhere."

"Thanks Catherine." Finally, about 10 minutes later, Nick had a strong enough signal to be able to call. Catherine stopped on the side of the road as Nick dialed the number. No answer – but to his surprise, the machine kicked in. He looked quizzically at Catherine.

"Maybe she's asleep?" she offered as a possible explanation.

"Maybe, but she's normally never asleep by now. What if something happened? Maybe I should call again?"

"Call once more – you don't want to wake her up if she's asleep. If she doesn't answer, call Grissom and let him know. He's closer to her place than we are – maybe someone can peek in and make sure she's okay." Nick nodded and dialed. Same thing. Instead, he called up the crime lab.

"Grissom." He heard over the phone.

"Gil – it's Nick."

"What's the matter?" he answered, a hint of concern in his voice.

"Nothing, as far as I know. I tried calling Sara's place. The machines on. Catherine thinks she might have just gone to bed, but we just wanted to let you know. We're getting bad reception out here. Maybe if someone's around the area they can just check in on her? I'll call later in case you find out anything, once we're back among civilization." Grissom couldn't blame Nick for being worried and overly cautious.

"I'll make sure she's fine. I'll be around the lab all evening – we'll call you, and if you don't answer we'll leave a voice message if we find out anything. If I have the chance, I'll swing by her place quickly – if it makes you feel better. I have a spare key too."

"Thanks Grissom." They hung up and Catherine looked over at Nick.

"Better?"

"Yah – thanks. Let's go." They headed down the dusty road back in the direction they came from, the desert sun long set behind the horizon.

-+-+-

The noise outside his office was disturbing his concentration. Didn't anyone appreciate the stillness of silence? Grissom got up and closed his office door. His desk was strewn with all the documents he could find about Chris. He hadn't been home in hours, nor had he slept in days. This case was impounded into his mind, and he knew he wouldn't rest until it was solved.

Suddenly, like a burst of wind, his door flew open. He looked up quickly and saw the skinny and pale brunette standing in front of him, shaking. He sat for a moment, shocked before he registered what was going on and shot up from his desk over towards her. Tears were streaming down her face. She hadn't said a word. He quickly closed the office door, for privacy's sake, before going over to and holding her by the shoulders, as if to steady her.

"Sara? What's the matter Sara?" She continued to stare, her brown eyes watery with tears, shaking back and forth. He said a bit louder, his eyes begging her to answer. "Sara! You need to answer me. What happened?" Grissom was about ready to call an ambulance. Her face was drained of almost all her life, her eyes filled with fear, her breathing ragged. Then, in a voice barely higher than a whisper, she said,

"He called me." Grissom stared at her for a few moments before he noticed her knees starting to give way. She continued to stare at him, as if she was pleading for him to make this go away. He took her hand, and put his other arm around her back and gently led her towards a chair, and helped her sit down, before pulling up another chair in front of her. He grabbed her hands in his, like he had in the hospital when she had had her breakdown. Only this time, her eyes were locked with his.

"Calm down Sara. You need to calm down okay?" She nodded slowly and closed her eyes, desperately trying to regulate her breathing. She finally got her breathing under control and opened her eyes. Grissom's gaze was intent on hers, overwhelmed with concern. "We should get you to the hospital." He said quickly. He knew he wasn't trained well enough to deal with this. He couldn't help her, as much as he wanted too. She shook her head violently no and started to gasp for breath again, still not talking. "Okay, okay. We'll stay here for now. Sara – you've got to calm down. What can I do to help? Are you worried he'll find you at the hospital?" She nodded slowly. At least she wasn't catatonic. Grissom kept watching her in silence, never looking away. Finally a few words passed through her lips, her eyes filled with more fear than ever,

"Don't let him find me. Please." With that, she burst into sobs. Grissom wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She rested her head against him and cried.


	15. Chapter 14

_A/N – well, I figured since I was already on a role, mind as well continue!_

**Chapter 14:**

Grissom was pacing back and forth. Sara had finally passed out from exhaustion on the couch in his office. He was reluctant to let her go back home, knowing that in no way should she be alone. Not to mention, he wanted her close-by where he could take care of her until Nick arrived. Warrick and Greg had come back from Chris's apartment with Brass, and Warrick had now taken over the incessant calling to Nick's cell. Still no answer. Hesitant to leave a sleeping Sara even alone in his office, in case she woke up, he instructed Warrick to keep trying to reach Nick, while he stayed with Sara.

He kept the door closed, knowing how precious and needed her sleep was. She looked so peaceful with her eyes closed, but her face showed all the exhaustion and hurt that she was feeling inside. Grissom couldn't even imagine what Sara was going through. Suddenly, as he looked over, he noticed her starting to stir. He rushed over to her side. She opened her eyes slowly.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked softly. She shrugged.

"Where's Nick?" she whispered. Grissom took her hand.

"We're still trying to get a hold of him. He's out in the desert with Catherine – he called before you came. He was worried why you weren't picking up the phone, and he wanted to let me know that they had bad reception." As Grissom looked up he saw a frantic looking Warrick outside his office, listening on his cell phone. When he noticed Grissom's gaze, he pointed to the phone and mouthed 'Nick.' He turned to Sara who was watching him intently.

"I need to go talk to Warrick okay? Nick's on the phone. I'm sure he'll be here soon. Just rest – close your eyes. We're going to take care of you okay? Nothing's going to happen to you." She just nodded, but didn't close her eyes again, only followed Grissom's path out the door.

-+-+-

"Nick…. Nick!" Warrick repeated several times. It was obvious Nick wasn't letting him get a word in edgewise. He looked over in frustration at his boss. He said quietly, one ear still on the phone,

"It's Nick. They stopped by the apartment. He's freaking out but he won't give me the chance to tell him that she's here." Grissom nodded.

"Give me the phone." Warrick handed it over to his boss.

"Nick!" he shouted. He heard the frantic voice on the other end, and in the background he could almost make out Catherine's anxious voice as well.

"Grissom – We stopped by the apartment on the way in. She's not here. She's gone. Have you heard from her? We need to find Chris. Oh God why is this happening?" He sounded near tears.

"Nick! NICK! You need to listen to me," Grissom said forcefully. There was nothing but stillness. "We've been trying to reach you for the last hour. Sara's here." Silence followed.

"What? Is she okay?" he asked quietly. Before Grissom could answer, he saw Sara leaning heavily against the doorframe of his office. She was so pale. Warrick rushed over to her. Tears were streaming down her face. Warrick shot a look at Grissom – we need to get her to the hospital. Grissom nodded curtly and noticed how she could barely stand and how badly she was trembling. Grissom said quietly into the phone, where Nick was desperately waiting for a response. "Just get here quickly Nick." The line went dead, as Sara's knees finally gave way. Warrick caught her before she hit the floor, and carried her into the office, Grissom at his heels. He placed her on the couch, and covered her with a blanket, which she gratefully accepted.

Grissom stood watching her deteriorate before his eyes. Was this ever going to end? How long would this haunt her? Maybe it was time she knew that they were going after Chris. There was no way she could stop them now. Warrick sat down beside her and wrapped his arm around her. She cuddled into his shoulder, as Grissom grabbed a chair and sat down in front of her. It was time she knew the truth.

"Sara, you need to know something…" he started. She sighed,

"I know. You're going after him." She said quietly. Warrick glanced at Grissom, who registered the same shock on his face.

"We need to – for your sake. We can't let him do this to you any longer. I know you've told Catherine some things. She's been staying out of the investigation, and Nick doesn't even know we've been looking into it. But we need to know what you've been hiding. I will not let him torture you like this – I can't." She nodded but noticed her eyes start to droop with exhaustion. He couldn't question her when she was this unstable. He couldn't bring himself to be that cruel, not to mention, he wanted Nick there. If anyone, Nick knew how to be there for her, he knew what she needed most.

They let her rest on the couch, as Warrick and Grissom both got up and went to the other side of the room. With a quick glance at Sara, whose eyes were closed, Grissom whispered quietly to Warrick,

"We need to get her to the hospital as soon as Nick gets here." Warrick nodded, but they both turned when they saw Sara, eyes wide, absolutely terrified.

"NO!" she shouted. "NO!" She started to cry hysterically. "No – please don't take me to the hospital. Please. No. Don't take me there. Please Grissom No!" She was starting to gasp for breath. Before either man had a chance to go over to her, the office door burst open and Nick came bolting in, over to where Sara was standing, shaking violently. He embraced her into his arms and she just sobbed, her head against his chest. Nick looked at the two men with desperation and said,

" What the hell is going on?"


	16. Chapter 15

_A/N – Hey I know I'm making you guys squirm and go crazy…which is why I'm writing yet another chapter, though I just finished an 8 hour shift…Though don't expect to see to many beans rolling around on the floor just yet…Just before I get people at the end of this chapter going ahh I knew it, or this is so lame or anything like that lol let me just say something – things aren't always as they seem. I'll just leave it at that! Until next post…_

**Chapter 15:**

"You can question her tomorrow. We need to get her home. I want an officer outside her door at all times – I want her to get a caller ID as well. Enough is enough – I know she doesn't want to press charges but I'm going to have to convince her otherwise." Nick, Grissom and Catherine were standing outside Dr. Robbins office, while he was examining and talking to Sara. Not wanting to cause her more stress, and after witnessing her fear of going back to the hospital, Grissom figured it was the best solution, and the doctor could give them a credible idea of what to do next. Before Grissom could answer, the door opened and Dr. Robbins stepped out into the hall. Catherine's eyes were red, and her hands were shaking with anxiety. She didn't know what to do, or if she should say something. She knew they were all expecting her to tell them the big secret, especially after Sara's latest episode.

"How is she?" Nick asked immediately. The doctor sighed.

"I'm actually not done, but I was hoping that maybe Catherine could join us?" Both men looked immediately at the distraught woman between them, as she nodded and went into the room, followed by Dr. Robbins. Once the door was closed again, the men took a seat outside in the hallway.

"Nick…there's something you should know." Grissom started. It was time for the truth to come out.

-+-+-

Nick wanted to be furious with his friends, that they would hide so much from him. Deep down, he knew that they had his and Sara's best interests at heart. And they were doing exactly what he wanted to do all along. He set his anger aside and decided to be as helpful as he could in finding the creep who had hurt Sara.

Finally, the moment came when the door opened. Nick shot up from his chair, and followed the doctor into the room, Grissom right behind him. Both of the women in the room looked like they had been through an emotional train wreck.

"Catherine is going to take Sara home and stay with her. She needs the night off. I also recommend having an officer stay outside her door." Dr. Robbins instructed without hesitation. Grissom just nodded and looked at his friend curiously, who wouldn't meet his gaze. Catherine always came across as tough, but now to be so vulnerable... "I also want you to abstain from questioning Sara until tomorrow – she needs some rest and I've prescribed her a sedative that should help. Sara, if you could come see me at some point next week?" She nodded, and after saying their short goodbyes, they walked out the door, closing it behind them.

"So doctor?" Grissom asked, as Dr. Robbins sighed.

"First off, you two must know right away that there is a lot I can't tell you."

"Not this patient confidentiality crap again!" Nick shouted.

"Nick – Sara has every right to privacy, if now more than ever!" The doctor replied forcefully. "Look, I understand you want to know what's going on, and trust me when I tell you that I have told Sara, and Catherine that they should let you know everything."

"So you know then? The secret?" Grissom said quietly. Dr. Robbins nodded.

"I have informed both women the importance of talking to you, but you must understand the delicacy of Sara's situation. Let her rest tonight, I am certain that she will be talking to you more tomorrow. They both know how important it is. As well, you may want to keep an eye on Catherine. This whole ordeal has been very hard on her, emotionally and physically. She needs a lot of support right now."

"Thank you doctor, are you sure there isn't anything else you can tell us?" Grissom asked.

"Well, Sara is very weak right now. The emotional and physical trauma she has sustained consistently the last few days and weeks are making it hard for her to recover. It's like the one step forwards, two-steps back saying. These episodes will keep happening until she gains some stability in her life, mainly putting the past behind her. And I told her that it wouldn't happen until Mr. Hartman is punished for his crimes. She knows this, and her reasons for keeping her secrets hidden were completely understandable, which is why she told Catherine, and why Catherine hasn't told a soul what has been eating her up inside. If these spells continue however, the consequences could be severe. She could slip back into her catatonic state, or even worse, try and kill herself. She knows to come see me again in a week for follow up."

"Should we take her to the hospital as well?" Nick asked. Dr Robbins hesitated for a moment.

"Not unless you absolutely have to. Otherwise, she should continued seeing her therapist, and I'll be her medical doctor for now. You'll understand soon enough."

-+-+-

"I'm so sorry Catherine." Sara said quietly. "I dragged you into all of this." Catherine sat down on the couch next to her friend and handed her the cup of tea.

"Sara – you needed to tell someone, and I understand. I don't blame you for wanting to keep this all to yourself, and I'm so proud that you at least told someone, but we're going to have to tell them. You know that don't you? It's gotten too far – it's not going to go away like we'd hoped." Sara nodded, the tears flowing down her face. "But not tonight. Take the pill that Al gave you and get a good sleep. There's an officer outside and I'll stay on the couch until you wake up, or until someone else gets here okay?" Catherine leaned over and hugged her friend again. What she was feeling paled in comparison to the torture she knew Sara was going through.

-+-+-

"Sir – I've told you already! You do not have permission to come into this building. Please leave the premises!" Nick and Grissom listened as they walked back down the hall, and went to see who was causing the commotion. A man was yelling at whoever was at the front desk, obviously affronted that he wasn't being let in. Warrick suddenly appeared beside them.

"What's going on?" Nick asked him.

"I don't know – I just heard the racket and decided to go see what's happening." The three men turned the corner and faced their worst enemy. Nick froze, unable to speak or move. However, Grissom stepped forward, his face livid, taking control of the situation.

"I told you once before that you were not aloud in this building." Chris stepped right up into Grissom's face. Warrick stood by Nick, ready to hold him back.

"First you send your officers over to my place, then you stop me from seeing my girlfriend? What the hell is this?" Nick lost it.

"Your GIRLFRIEND? If you so much as think about Sara, I swear I will tear you from limb to limb." Warrick was struggling to hold Nick back. People were starting to come out of the rooms to watch the uproar in the hallway.

"Again, you guys are talking in riddles. I haven't done anything – the sooner you all realize this and leave me the heck alone, the better. All I want is to talk to Sara – she won't pick up her phone." He said, with a small smirk on his face. "We never finished our conversation from earlier."

"AND YOU NEVER WILL YOU BASTARD!" Nick yelled, fighting to get away from Warrick and now Grissom's grip.

"There is so little you know. You think you know Sara? You're wrong. She's going to want to talk to me. After all, she is having my baby. You don't have anything on me anyways, so leave me alone. Sara's personal life is none of your god damn business." With that he turned around and walked away.


	17. Chapter 16

A/N – you guys are so bad! I have a midterm tomorrow and should be studying but here I am writing another chappie…hmmm…lol I know its not your fault, I just love seeing the responses to the chapters because especially at the last one I laugh… oh how much you don't know… (Sorry - I'm still going to be keeping up with the suspense!)

**Chapter 16:**

"Pregnant?" Nick whispered. As Warrick handed him a cup of coffee before sipping at his own. Grissom was sitting in his chair behind his desk, obviously deep in thought.

"If you think about it, it almost makes sense. Why she fainted, why she told Catherine. The mood swings…why she didn't want any of us to know. This must have been hard enough, having her deal with Chris, a guy who was hitting her – knowing she was pregnant with his baby,"

"Well we can get him with abuse. That's a start. Anything that gets him in prison is fine by me." Nick said.

"It's not going to be easy. Sara will have to testify. I've still got this gut feeling though, that there's more to it. It seems more than mere coincidence that Sara knew the man who raped that little girl a few weeks ago, and that he was a friend of Chris. Sara never found out whom we arrested. She probably has no idea. But the question is, what do we do now that we know?" Nick sat in thought, and looked over at Grissom who was still lost in another world. He probably hadn't heard a word they were saying. He turned back to face Warrick.

"We let her tell us. Dr. Robbins was right – it was private and Chris really had no right to even tell us. It should've been Sara's decision. Let her come to us, she will have to eventually. Then we support her and we love her and the baby." Nick answered quietly. Both men turned to look at their boss.

"Grissom?" Warrick said. He turned to face them.

"Yeah – I agree…" was all he replied back.

"What were you thinking about?" Nick asked, the creases in his forehead deepening.

"There are still way to many questions unanswered – How was he involved in the rape case, why was Sara so scared to go to the hospital and is there anything more that she isn't telling us?"

"We can talk to them tomorrow – maybe everything will make more sense in the morning." Warrick suggested. Grissom nodded and added,

"Why don't we go over to Sara's apartment after shift? We should check up on Catherine too." They all agreed.

-+-+-

Not wanting to wake up the women, in case they were still asleep, Nick took his key after he, Warrick and Grissom all showed their ID's to the guard outside and quietly slipped into the apartment. Warrick made his way over to the couch, where Catherine was sleeping peacefully, wrapped snuggly under a blanket. She must have heard the commotion, because the moment Warrick turned to leave, she opened her eyes.

"What are you guys doing here?" she asked, as she sat up quickly and tried to smooth out the wrinkles in her top.

"We came to see you and Sara." Grissom responded.

"She's probably still asleep – she took one of those sedatives Dr. Robbins gave her. She'll be asleep for a little bit yet. Anyone want coffee?" She went to get up but Warrick pushed her back down on the couch.

"We'll make it – you take it easy too. This has been a difficult situation for you too." She nodded, happy to still have the chance to wake up. Once she had a few moments to reacquaint herself with the world she quickly stood up.

"Shoot! I've got to go see Lindsey before she goes to school!" She made her way towards the door, where Grissom stopped her.

"It's okay Cath – we took care of it. Your moms watching her – she knows a little bit about the situation from what you've told her and she's more than happy to watch Lindsey until later." Catherine nodded and gratefully accepted the cup of coffee being offered to her. They all sat down in Sara's small living room.

"How's Sara doing?" Nick asked softly.

"I honestly don't know. We didn't have a chance to talk about it too much last night. I know she feels really bad for dragging me into all of this…" Catherine left off.

"Dragging you into what?" Grissom asked. Catherine shook her head.

"It's for Sara to tell you, not me. You'll have to wait – I'm sorry but it's really not my place." Warrick nodded and took her hand. Nick kept glancing at Sara's closed bedroom door, then said,

"I'm going to change quickly – all my stuff is in the spare bedroom. Then I'm just going to peek in on Sara and make sure she's okay." They all nodded and continued to sit silently. Nick went into his room and grabbed some fresh clothes. He walked across the hall to Sara's room and pressed his ear against the wall. No noises. He slowly opened the door a little crack to peek in and noticed her unmade bed. The unmade bed that held no body lying fast asleep. Immediately, he flew open the door, and gasped in horror.

Sara was lying face down on the floor, half dressed, her sleeping pills strewn out all around her, the empty bottle still clutched in her hand.


	18. Chapter 17

_A/N – hehehe. That's all I have to say!_

**Chapter 17:**

"God Sara – Please! You've got to wake up. Please Sara. Don't do this." Nick desperately shook Sara, praying she was alive, tears of desperation streaming down his face. Hearing Nick's cry for help, Grissom ran into the bedroom and dropped to his knees beside Sara's unmoving body.

"Oh God no," was all he said. Nick looked up desperately at his friends standing in the doorway, Catherine sobbing in Warrick's arms.

"She's alive." Grissom said with relief. "She's got a pulse and it's pretty strong. Nick – I need you to gather the pills on the floor and count them. We need to know how many she took. There were 30 in the bottle this afternoon." Nick started gathering them and counting, as Grissom continued to attempt to revive Sara.

"I don't get it – there's only one missing." He said. Just then, Sara started to stir a little. Nick dropped the pill bottle and reached for her hand.

"Sara, can you hear me?" Grissom asked softly. Her eyes fluttered open. Drowsy eyes. She tried to sit up but was having difficulty. Nick pulled her into his arms tears streaming down his face.

"What's going on?" She asked quietly, rubbing her neck, once Nick let her out of his grip.

"We though you were…you were…" Nick started. Grissom took over,

"You were passed out on the floor, your pills all around you. We thought you had OD'd. Do you remember what happened? Are you okay?" She nodded.

"I was really tired when Catherine and I got home last night. We talked for a bit, but then I went to bed. I could barely keep my eyes open but Dr. Robbins told me to take a sedative, so I did. I needed water, so I took the pill in my bathroom, but brought the pill bottle back into my room. I dropped it by accident, and was in the process of trying to put them all back and I guess I dozed off on the floor. That's all I remember." She looked around at all her friends, half in tears. It was then she realized how blessed she was to have all of them. She turned to Nick and said softly,

"I'm so sorry – I didn't mean to make you all worry." Unable to hold in her emotions, she burst into tears. Nick gathered her in his arms, her head against his chest, as he looked at his three friends, all sighing in relief.

-+-+-

Sara leaned her head against Nick. She was dreading this moment. She didn't want to look into Grissom's eyes and tell him. She didn't want people to talk about what happened behind her back. She didn't want the pity. Warrick had taken Catherine home to rest again and calm down after their scare that morning. Instead, Brass came over. The moment he walked in the door, he enveloped Sara in a tight hug.

"Thank God you're alright." He whispered in her ear. Now he was sitting across from her, watching her intently. Nick sat beside her, one arm around her shoulder, the other grasping her hand. Grissom took the chair right in front of them.

"Sara," Grissom started, but hesitated, "you know that at any time we can take a break okay?" She nodded. "Why don't you start at the beginning? When you first starting seeing Chris?"

"I met him at a book store. He was really nice. I was browsing through the forensic books; he told me that he was interested in that sort of stuff too. Asked me what I did. We arranged to meet up for coffee the next day. I was happy because it had been so long since I felt like someone was interested in me." She desperately tried to hold back the tears as all three men stiffened in their seats, for three different reasons.

"We started seeing each other frequently from then on. Went out with some of his friends. It actually felt nice, having a normal life for once." She gave short laugh, one that didn't show any pleasure, but rather horror at the reality her so-called life became. "One night a few weeks ago, I decided to drop by suddenly at his apartment. He wasn't home, but I decided to wait for a few moments. Sure enough he pulled up, with 2 of his friends. He was not happy to see me. He pulled me aside and demanded what I was doing there. I asked him what he had done and why they all looked so guilty. When his two other friends came closer…I was shocked. I already knew Josh; I had met him before but the other man with them. He was, someone from my past."

"Who?" Brass asked gently. She shook her head no while pleading with her eyes, every tear showing her regret. Grissom sighed, but motioned for her to continue.

"I knew they had done something. Something wasn't right I knew it. I was ecstatic to see the man I knew from before, but he was less than civil with me. It broke my heart. Chr…Chri…Chr…" She closed her eyes. "Chris. He asked them to leave so we could talk. I didn't want them to go – not until I had found out where my friend had been all this time, but they did go. That was the first time he got angry with me, and he hurt me. I wanted to pass it off but I couldn't. I was going to confront him about it, turn him in."

"Why didn't you?" Grissom asked. Sara sighed.

"We had been seeing each other for over a month. I found some things out. It changed everything. I was still going to confront him about it, and tell him that I wanted to break up though, but I couldn't bring myself to press charges. I was just going to get him out of my life and move on. I invited him for dinner one night. I knew it was then that I had to tell him, but then you called me into work Grissom. I couldn't hold off telling him – when he arrived I did. And then I left. The next morning, when I got home from work, there was a note. The one I'm sure you've all read by now." They all nodded.

"He paid me a visit that morning. He was angry, so angry that this time I needed to go to the hospital. After that day, I wanted to be rid of him forever. I knew you guys would find out about him hurting me. And I knew you would all want to press charges but I couldn't. I couldn't tell you that I knew he was involved in something – I think it was something big. I found this in his apartment and took it." She handed the crumpled piece of paper to Grissom. He read it out loud,

"Chris - Number 2 has been spotted, number 1 disposed of. Same place in 2 weeks. You know what to do. Josh." He looked up at Sara. It didn't take a genius to know that they were doing something illegal. Only, what Sara didn't know was that this was the key to getting Chris in jail for good. This might have linked him to the rape of the 13-year-old girl. Only it meant, that there was another victim they still hadn't found.

"Why couldn't you tell us Sara?" Brass asked kindly.

"Because I had to protect him." She burst into tears, as she had so many times already. It was a good sign though, a sign that she wasn't hiding her emotions. Nick looked at Grissom and Brass and they all silently acknowledged that their talk was finished.

-+-+-

Nick closed the bedroom door. Sara was fast asleep, this time wrapped snugly in her bed. He turned to his two friends.

"Why is she protecting him? And why won't she tell us about the baby?" he asked. Both men looked clueless to the answer.

"Maybe she's not ready to talk about the baby yet – maybe the baby has nothing to do with all of this or maybe she's in denial." Brass suggested.

"Or maybe Chris was lying." Grissom added.

"We need to go over the rape case again. See if there is any evidence linking Chris Hartman to the attack. See if we can find Josh Whitman's first victim too. We could get him in prison for life." Brass and Grissom both left to go home and get some sleep. Nick kicked off his shoes and crawled into his own bed at Sara's apartment. But every 5 minutes, he found himself getting up to check and make sure Sara was still all right. After the 7th time, just as he was closing the door, he heard a small voice call his name.

"Nick – why don't you just sleep in here with me?" Sara said quietly, her eyes glued on his. He smiled softly and climbed in next to her, wrapped his arm around her waist, and the both slept the day away.


	19. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18:**

"Josh Whitman refuses to talk. Big surprise. We'll need evidence linking Chris Hartman." Catherine announced, at the beginning of their shift. There was only one of their number missing – Sara, who was still at home. Nick even managed to get in, but requested a case closer to home this time. Now, with the officer outside the apartment door, he felt a bit better about leaving her alone. Since they had talked that morning, she had seemed better as well, and even was making a bit of food when he left. It was a good sign.

"Catherine…" It was the question she had been dreading all day. She knew they were coming and wasn't prepared. She had no idea what exactly Sara told them. She raised her eyebrows at Grissom. He continued, "There's still a few blanks Sara left out. We didn't want to push. Can we at least ask you the questions and you can answer them if you feel like you can?" Catherine sighed, but nodded. Warrick kept a close eye on her, but said,

"Why don't you tell us what Sara said first – since we both don't know?" Grissom agreed, and he and Nick were both able to get all of the details out. Catherine frowned at the end, a frown Grissom picked up on.

"Was she telling the truth?" Catherine looked up at him.

"Yes – completely." Grissom and Nick both felt like she was hiding something though. "Ask away your questions – I don't know how much I can tell you though, she covered it pretty well."

"Okay then – do you know who the 3rd person is, the one with Chris and Josh - the one from her past?"

"Yes."

"Can you tell us who?" Nick asked back.

"I can't."

"Okay," Grissom continued, slightly frustrated, "Why was Sara so scared to go to the hospital when we suggested it yesterday?" Catherine didn't know how to answer that question. She knew she should, but didn't want to break any confidences.

"Because…because someone paid her a visit in the hospital and bad memories. I can't say anything more. I'm sorry." At least it was a start. Grissom looked at Nick, who decided to let the man ask the last question. Nick's voice was soft and quiet.

"Why did Chris come in here and tell us that Sara is having his baby?" This one rattled Catherine – she didn't know that they knew. She sat in shock for a few moments, trying to absorb the question, and come up with the right answer. She didn't know that Chris had come by and broken such a precious confidence.

"Again," she said in a low voice, "I can't tell you that. That is in Sara's hands. It's not my place. Anything else?"

"One last thing." Grissom said. Nick looked at him curiously, realizing it must have been one of his epiphanies. They had already asked everything they wanted to know.

"Okay?"

"Are we wasting our time going after Chris – are we missing the real problem? If you could tell us everything, and this wasn't personal, would you be going full fury on this case?"

"That's two questions." She answered with a small smirk that quickly vanished as she thought through her answers. She said slowly, "You're not wasting your time…" She left her answer dangling telling Grissom all he needed to know. There was more involved. "And, if this wasn't personal, even though it is, I still would."

"Have you told Sara about Josh Whitman and what we actually think he and his buddies did?" Nick asked. Catherine shook her head no.

"She doesn't need that hanging over her head now, she can find out later once she's more recovered." Catherine replied, but then excused herself to the washroom, leaving the three men behind with plenty more questions than answers.

-+-+-

"I hope you weren't asleep." Catherine said quietly into the phone, glancing occasionally at the door.

"No, I'm still up – don't worry," came Sara's soft voice from the other end. "What's up?"

"The boys just came to talk to me. Asked me to answer some questions they had from this morning. They didn't want to push you." She could almost see the small frown forming on Sara's face.

"What sort of questions? I answered everything they asked – the only thing I didn't tell them was about Daniel, but you knew I couldn't do that. I've got to protect him Cath."

"I know, I know. I knew they would ask about him. They also asked about the hospital. I didn't let on to any information, but Sara, be realistic – they're going to find out sooner or later. Do you really think they're just going to let this go? Even once they get Chris, which they will soon, Daniel will get dragged into this. You don't need to protect him. You told me yourself that if this wasn't…well, personal, you would arrest the guy. He shouldn't be out free."

"I know, but I can't Catherine. I can't. If they find out, they find out, but it won't be from me – I won't betray him." Catherine sighed, but answered,

"I think they think you're trying to protect Chris, and that the reason you wouldn't press charges was because you didn't want Chris arrested."

"I knew they would figure that. That's why I was hoping that they would arrest him, and then leave it at that. I hope he goes to jail forever. Look what he did to me. He's the last person I'd try to protect. I was hoping to use him as a decoy…so much for that plan. I thought everything would settle once they caught him – they need to catch him. Did you find out yet what the note Chris' friend left for him meant? Do you know what they were doing so secretively?" Catherine didn't know what to say – she hated lying, especially when Sara had already told her so much.

"We're getting there." She felt it was a safe answer. "I hope we get Chris soon…"

"Me too…" Sara said in a whisper. "He scares me. The accident, whatever he's doing illegally, the phone calls…if we don't get him soon, he's going to kill me. I know it."

"Don't talk like that Sara. I promise you he won't hurt you again. We would never let that happen. But there is something else you need to know. Chris came here – you're going to have to tell the boys about the baby. They already know about the pregnancy, but nothing more. I'm sorry honey but you're going to have to deal with it sooner than planned. I can help you if you want." All she could hear were the small sobs on the other end.

"Okay – I'll come in later." She replied.

"No – I don't think you should drive here alone!"

"Who shouldn't drive here alone?" asked a voice from the doorway. Catherine turned around and saw Warrick standing, looking at her curiously. "Umm Sara?"

"Yeah?" came her small voice,

"One of us will get you first okay – don't leave alone. Promise? Call me if you want a ride. I've got to go. I'll see you later – get some sleep. If you don't make it tonight, its not the end of the world."

"Okay – thanks again Catherine. I owe you so much for this." They both hung up their phones, as Warrick continued to watch Catherine, concern in his eyes. He walked over to the sink where she was standing and enveloped her into a hug.

"Is Sara alright?" he asked

"No, but she's getting there. She wants to come in tonight, she got some things she needs to tell everyone." Warrick nodded. "Umm Warrick?"

"Yeah?" he asked, looking at her. Her eyes were full of sadness, though a small smile started to appear on her face.

"What are you doing in here?" He grinned.

"Hey - It's not like it's the first time. I wanted to make sure you were okay. Look – when Sara calls and wants to come in, let me know – I'll get her okay?"

"Thanks Warrick." she whispered.

"Anytime…" he replied as they both walked back out of the ladies room and headed towards Grissom's office.


	20. Chapter 19

A/N – I am so sorry I haven't updated lately. I'm right in the middle of midterms. (YUCK!)

What are you guys doing to me? I have a math midterm in the morning, its 11pm and I'm writing fan fiction…something doesn't seem right… lol

**Chapter 19:**

"Boss! You're going to want to see this!" Greg exclaimed. Grissom followed him quickly to the DNA lab.

"What is it?" he asked quickly, raising his eyebrows at the elated face of the young lab tech.

"I processed some of the few pieces of evidence that we hadn't gotten to yet from the rape case. I got a positive match to Chris!"

"That is wonderful! I'll call Brass right away. This is just what we needed to get him in jail. Tell the others if you see them." Grissom rushed to his office and gave his friend a call. As he hung up the phone, he sighed in relief. Chris would finally be off the streets and Sara would be safe and able to move on with her life again.

Grissom hurried down the hall to see Warrick and Catherine walking out of, what at first he suspected to be the woman's washroom. He brushed it off quickly and joined his friends to tell them the good news. He wanted to see Catherine's reaction.

"Really? You mean we can arrest him?" Grissom nodded happily.

"Sara won't even have to testify. We have proof that connects him to the other rape case. If we put enough pressure on Josh Whitman or Chris Hartman, we may be able to get a confession from either of them." Both men turned to look at Catherine. She was smiling.

"It's wonderful. That jerk needs to be thrown in jail..." She stopped abruptly as she felt her cell phone vibrate. .

"It's Sara – one second. Hey Sar. No, not too busy here. Yeah, for sure someone can. You sure you're ready? Okay. Bye." She hung up.

"What's going on?" Warrick asked. "Does she want to come in now?" Catherine nodded.

"She can't sleep. Too many things on her mind. She figures, if she talks about it, then maybe it will help. She called her shrink too. She thinks it would be a good idea to finally get it off her chest."

"I'll hop over and pick her up. I'll be back soon." Warrick announced and turned to walk out to the parking lot. Grissom looked at Catherine.

"Is she going to be okay talking about…whatever?" Catherine sighed.

"No, but she needs to." The both turned to see Nick walking down the corridor, a smile the size of Texas on his face.

"Please tell me that what Greg just told me is true…" Grissom nodded. Nick let out a shout of joy before hugging Catherine, and then to his surprise, Grissom.

"I don't know how to thank you guys." Grissom replied,

"No need Nick. As long as Sara's okay. I just want life to go back to normal." Catherine responded with a smile, thrilled to see Nick so happy again, but knowing in her heart Sara's life would never be the same as it used to be.

-+-+-

As soon as she arrived, Sara was greeted with hug after hug from almost the entire staff in the CSI building. Grissom watched from a distance. She was still too thin, and pale, but he could see her old smile starting to come back. She had a long road ahead but she was strong and he admired that about her. The bruises on her arms were starting to fade, arms that she wrapped protectively around her stomach. She was still feeling insecure. He could see it in her posture, in the way she was acting. Uncomfortable. He couldn't blame her. After the roller coaster ride she had been on, it was no wonder.

However, there was one person he noticed that she looked relaxed around. Nick had his arm wrapped behind her back, and she leaned ever so slightly towards him. He was good for her, and Grissom was happy for them. It had never entered his conscience of Sara and Nick being together, but after what he had witnessed the last few weeks, more than ever he believed that they were good for each other. If there were anyone Sara would rely on in her time of need, it would be Nick. The small crowd finally made their way into the break room.

"Hi Grissom." Sara whispered quietly.

"Hey Sara – how are you doing?" She shrugged, but then gave a small smile.

"Better." He couldn't help but smile back.

"Where's Jim?" She asked innocently, looking around the room. She had requested that all her personal friends be there. Nick grinned at her.

"There's something we need to tell you Sara. Good news." Just then there came a loud noise from the hall and they all turned to see what it was. Chris was yelling at the two officers holding him, along with Brass. Nick immediately grasped Sara's hand. Not sure what she was going to do next, it surprised everyone when she slowly stood up and walked towards the door, stood in the entrance and watched the scene he was making.

"Sara…stay in here." Nick got up and stood beside her. Her gaze didn't shift, but she squeezed his hand back. "Please. You don't need to see him. That's the good news honey. We got him – he's being arrested. He won't ever hurt you again." She nodded, but continued to watch. Warrick, Catherine, Grissom and Greg weren't sure what to do.

Chris finally noticed the pair of eyes staring at him from the doorway of the break room. He started to fight desperately to get out of the grip of the officers and make his way over to where Sara was. Brass saw the look of fright on her face as he looked at her with such hatred in his eyes. He finally broke loose. Nick immediately pulled out his gun and stood in front of Sara. Brass did the same, both men aiming their guns, wishing they could pull the trigger. The scene froze for a few moments as Brass slowly made his way to the man, stuck half way between two men who wanted him dead more than anything else in the world, guns drawn in their hands.

His anger overtook him as he thrust his gun to Chris's head.

"You will never hurt her again – you hear me? You deserve to die." Brass shouted at him.

"BITCH!" he shouted at Sara. Nick lowered his gun, and had his other arm around her, holding her tight, half trying to drag her away from the situation but she stood firm. "You'll pay for this! This isn't over!" This time Nick lost it and started to make his way over to the man. Sara wasn't going to pay. He was. He was going to pay for hurting the woman he loved more than his own life.

"No!" Sara shouted as she ran over. "Not like this." She pleaded. She grabbed gently onto Brass's arm, and he conceded and lowered his gun. She turned to Nick, his gun drawn and pointed directly at Chris. "Nick. Please." He turned to look at her, and when he saw the pleading tears in her eyes, he too lowered his gun. The two officers came forward and handcuffed Chris. He looked Sara straight in the eye, but she didn't back down.

"You can't stop me." He whispered. Nick and Jim both looked on, confused.

"I would die before I would let you ever have the chance." She said quietly back. With that she turned around and walked back into the room, Nick at her side. They were all stunned at what had just happened, and sat in silence until Brass walked in and closed the door. Sara took a deep breath.

"There's something I need to tell you all…"


	21. Chapter 20

_A/N –Fine! You all win! I really should be doing homework, but I'll write another chappie instead. If I flunk out – it's all your fault! I'm glad you're all loving the suspense (hehehe) maybe I'll just have to add some more! (This story isn't done yet…)_

**Chapter 20**:

They all sat in anticipation to what Sara was going to say. She kept glancing at Catherine, who would nod encouragingly. Nick wrapped his arm around her for support, thinking the same thing as everyone else. They were all sure she was going to tell them about her pregnancy, but with the facts so vague, the team also was hoping to get more information to fill in all the blanks this case had left in its trail.

"Catherine informed me about some information that's been going around here. The reason I didn't bring this up earlier was because, well, I didn't think I could, or needed to yet." The tears started to flow down her face. Catherine could feel the lump starting to form in her throat. Everyone else held looks of anticipation. "I wanted to tell you, I really did. Especially you Nick." She turned to look at him. His kind eyes responded back with all the love she needed to get through what she needed to say.

"Sara. It's okay. We'll support you through this. I don't love you any less because of what happened and I know everyone else feels the same way." They all nodded.

"One second. I do appreciate your support more than anything in the world and I am going to need all your help and support to get through this. But I don't think we're talking about the same 'this'." Grissom looked at her, utterly puzzled. If it wasn't the baby, then what was it? Catherine noticed the same confusion mirrored on everyone's faces. A look of grief and despair consumed Sara's face. Even Catherine couldn't hold back her tears, knowing what was coming next. Sara's voice was barely higher than a whisper, but everyone in the room caught every word.

"I'm not pregnant…anymore." With that she burst into tears and sobbed into Nick's shoulder. He held her tightly, still confused, but devastated for Sara. Warrick took Catherine's hand as the tears flowed down her face. Grissom just kept staring at Sara, still trying to register what was going on. When she had finally calmed down a bit, she tried to continue.

"Remember how I told you, that I had something to tell Chris? Then I went into work and he was angry? When I got home he hurt me and I needed to go to the hospital?" Nick stomach clenched. He knew what was coming. He didn't want her to have to say it. He could see the torment on her face, the grief. It finally all made sense.

"I found out I was pregnant. We had suspected it earlier, but I just had been confirmed. I was about a month along, but after that day when he hit me because I was suspicious about what he and his friends were doing, I told him that I was going to raise the baby alone and he was going to leave us be. Then Grissom called me in. I was happy to get away; I wasn't sure how he was going to react. I got his note when I got home from work, and later that day he paid me a visit…" She drifted off again, the tears welling in her eyes. She closed them for a moment. Grissom could see her struggling with trying to tell them. It was no wonder she had confided this all in Catherine. Of all people, she would have understood the best. Sara continued, crying softly as she spoke each word.

"He told me that I couldn't get rid of him that easily, and that he wasn't going to support some child for the rest of his life. He was so angry. He hit me hard and I fell. I was dazed for a few minutes but heard him slam the door and leave. Suddenly, something felt wrong and my abdomen started to hurt. I was so scared. I drove myself to the hospital, where I lost my baby." She burst into tears, as Nick's heart broke and mourned over the little one that was lost. Silence followed for a few moments. No one knew what to say. How could they comfort Sara? What words could there be that would make her feel well again? Grissom knew he couldn't think of any.

Everything made sense to him now. Nick was devastated over Sara's loss; he had been secretly a little bit excited about the thought of having a baby. He wanted to be a father. What hurt the most was the pain Sara was going through. He wished he could take it all away for her. Sara was the first to break the silence,

"What kind of mother would I have been anyways? I couldn't even protect my baby from him."

"This is not your fault Sara!" Brass exclaimed. "There was nothing you could have done. I know you, and I know that you would never do anything intentional to harm someone. Chris is in jail for good – I'll make sure of that. I'm so sorry."

After hugging Sara, offering their condolences and support, the rest of the team decided to give Sara and Nick some time alone to talk. Catherine hugged Sara especially tightly.

"I'm proud of you – I know that wasn't easy. There's nothing worse than losing a child, but like I've been telling you. Don't blame yourself. You're going to be a great mom one day. It just wasn't meant to be." Sara nodded and gave her a weak smile.

"Thanks. For everything Cath." But before leaving, Catherine said quietly to her friend,

"What about Da-?" Sara shook her head no, as Grissom looked on suspiciously.

Sara sat down again, next to Nick. The room was empty, and Sara felt alone with her thoughts. She didn't know what Nick was thinking. Maybe he was angry that she hadn't told him about the baby. Maybe he didn't want her anymore. Nick had become such an important person in her life the last few weeks, she could hardly bear the thought of him not wanting anything to do with her. At the thought, a few tears slid down her face. She felt Nick's warm hand brush them away. She turned to see him staring intently in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry Nick."


	22. Chapter 21

_A/N – sorry everyone…I know this chappie is long over due, but midterms and work…you know the drill!_

**Chapter 21:**

Endless thoughts were reeling through Nick's mind. He didn't even noticed the tear filled eyes that were staring at him, waiting for any response.

"Nick?" She whispered. She was scared by his silence, desperate for any words – especially words that would tell her how much he loved her, how much he still wanted to be with her. He turned to look at her. She tried to gage his facial expressions but couldn't.

"You went through all of that alone?" Nick finally managed to get out. Sara nodded and looked at her hands. It had been the lowest point of her life, and that included having seen your mother kill your father.

"I didn't… I didn't know how to tell anyone."

"I should've known Sara. I should've been there for you. You sat in the hospital all alone, and lost your baby. You must have been so scared honey." She curled up into his arms and they sat on the couch. No matter how hard she tried, the images running through her head wouldn't go away.

-+-+-

"We need to talk." He said firmly as he sat back down, in his chair. Catherine sighed, knowing exactly where this conversation was going to lead.

"Warrick – would you mind excusing us just for a moment?" Catherine asked kindly. The man shot looks between the two and left quietly, closing the door behind him. "Need I ask what this is about?" Grissom looked at her. Sara's appearance had changed in the last few weeks; her pale face had become more pale and sullen, like a plant devoid of light, her body weakened and way too skinny. Her eyes showed the pain, pain he was finally beginning to understand now that the riddles seemed to have been solved. However, Catherine was another story.

They knew now what she had been hiding all along, and how much it must have eaten her up inside to have to help Sara bear her burdens. She did it graciously, yes, but with a toll on herself. One Grissom knew both women regretted the consequences of. Grissom knew that if he didn't want to lose anyone, he was going to put his foot down and make sure everything was taken care of. No more secrets, no more hiding. He wasn't going to see his friends destroy themselves any longer.

"I want to know who you asked Sara about."

"Gil – I don't know what you…"

"Don't play games with me Catherine." He replied wearily as she took a seat across his desk. She sighed again.

"Gil, you know I can't."

-+-+-

Sara and Nick walked through her door. She stared around the apartment, feeling the chills creep up her spine. Nick noticed her tenseness, how many memories that he didn't know about that would flood into her mind. They both sat on the couch. He thought she had fallen asleep and went to carefully move but she startled him by speaking up.

"Nick – what's going on with us?" she said quietly. He hadn't been expecting that.

"Well, Sara, it's just…" he started to sputter. Her eyes drew downcast. He took a deep breath and whispered to her, "Sara – I don't know if you're ready, I don't know what you need. All I want is for you to be happy and to be safe and to be loved."

"You don't want to love me." She said as she turned her eyes away.

"I can't help but love you Sara."

"Really? After everything I've done?" He nodded and gave her a weak smile. She leaned into his chest and they both lay in each other's arms. A loud noise outside made Sara jump suddenly. He noticed how scared she was, even in her own home, even with her attackers behind bars.

"Sara – what do you think about us both moving into my place? I mean I think this roommate thing has been working out good. Maybe a change of scenery would help you our, help you recover – forget the bad memories and start new."

"Are you sure you want to still live with me?" She said, looking deep into his eyes and biting her bottom lip.

"Would I ask if I didn't want you to?" She gave him a small smile, one that made his heart jump, and eyes want to cry with love. "Is that a yes?" She nodded.

-+-+-

"Gil, you know I can't." said Catherine. "I made a promise. Sara has her reasons."

"Tell me once and for all. Is this case solved? Over? Is it done? I am not going to have my CSI's in danger any longer by these men. We all know there was a third person in the story. I don't know, or maybe even you and Sara don't know his involvement, but if he is, I want to make it clear that I will stop at nothing to get him. Understood? Is he involved?" Catherine sat in silence. Grissom had his answer. He moved to get up.

"Wait." She said. He looked at her quizzically. "Gil Grissom don't you dare go spouting off any theories to anyone about this quite yet. Sit back down." He was slightly surprised at her tone, as though being scorned like a child. He did, however, take his seat.

"We, Sara included, don't know anything about his involvement. Sara is dead sure that he isn't, and I want to trust her judgment. He may have had other small indiscretions, but as far as I am aware, nothing you need to be chasing after him about. I could be wrong. Sara isn't necessarily levelheaded on this subject but I trust her. You have caught two men; two men that were harassing and abusing Sara. Yes, Josh Whitman abused Sara too. Right before we arrested him. They won't bother her anymore. She lost her baby and she needs time to heal. We don't need to drag this on any longer."

"What about 'him'? Is he still around?"

"I made it clear to him that he was to leave Sara alone. For what I understand he's left town."

"Catherine," Grissom started, "I need you to promise me one thing." She nodded. "If this guy, or anyone else comes back and you know about it – you don't hesitate. You come to me immediately."

"I promise." She made her way to get up.

"One second Catherine." She turned around at the door to look at her friend and coworker.

"What?"

"Make sure Sara knows that betraying her brother wouldn't make her at all like her mother." Catherine's mouth gaped in shock.

"How did you?"

"Daniel Sidle. 7 years older than Sara, lived in Los Angeles for the last few years. Your little slip confirmed my theory. There's a reason why I'm a CSI." Catherine just nodded and left his office, leaving Gil to wonder even more if this really was over.


	23. Chapter 22

_A/N – I am so sorry! This chapter is long overdue. I promise ill make it up to you all!_

**Chapter 22:**

Nick brought in the last box into his place and collapsed on the couch next to his favorite girl. A week had passed; 7 days that had an enormous effect on Sara. She wasn't completely healed but with time, she was getting there. Her smile was more frequent and melted his heart every time he saw it. She was still a little squeamish when people touched her suddenly, tending to jump back quickly but apologetic afterwards and pretty normal considering the emotional roller coaster ride she had just been on.

The day finally came when Grissom allowed her back at work. They all kept a cautious eye on her. Gracefully, she would smile softly whenever she saw their eyes meet hers with concern and weariness. The previous evening she had been sitting studying some photographs. Grissom was over at the other side of the room. Her neck stiff, she looked up to see his eyes on her. It hadn't been the first time he had done that. Immediately he would divert his attention somewhere else. The old Sara would have been annoyed at all the coddling, but now it only made her feel more loved. After the 3rd time, she finally spoke up,

"Grissom – I don't think anything's going to happen to me while I'm staring at these pictures." She said quietly, with a small smile. He gave his typical Grissomish sheepish look back.

"You never know…" She just rolled her eyes and went back to work, catching him again 10 minutes later.

Thoughts streamed through Grissom's mind all the while; thoughts that Sara couldn't see while he watched her carefully return back to the normalcy her old life. Their relationship had definitely turned in a different direction he had never imagined possible. Maybe a small part of him regretted that they had never had a romantic involvement, but he knew that he could never have given her what she needed. Nick was much better suited to the job and he was happy for them. But their friendship had changed too. He saw her in a different light than he used to. He felt more protective of her, and was aware of emotions he had never let himself feel before; not romantic ones, but rather loving her in a way that only their special relationship would bring.

The way Grissom, Warrick and even Nick treated her was nothing compared to how Brass had changed. More and more, Sara found herself drawn to him, almost like the father she had never had. They had always had a special bond, but since everything that had happened, especially the news about her miscarriage, Brass had stepped into a role in her life that she had never imagined would be filled. Every time he hugged her, she felt loved like a daughter being embraced by her dad. He warned Nick that if he broke her heart, he would break his legs – something that surprised the both of them, seeing as though they weren't dating, only…living together.

Sara knew she was blessed for the people in her life. Catherine had become a great friend, and her relationship with her other colleagues had never been closer. Back at work, Sara was content with herself, helping her move past what had happened. Above all, it was Nick that had saved her. She had never realized how deeply she cared for him. Nothing had happened "romantically" between them, but they both were aware of each other's deep feelings for the other, knowing that with time they would be able to approach the chemistry that had grown between them. Sara still needed to heal but life was finally on the mend.

She sat on the couch, next to Nick, in silence. She had officially moved in. Her apartment was empty and up for sale, all her boxes scattered across the living room and bedroom of Nick's, and now her house. Her thoughts strayed to Daniel. She prayed that he wasn't involved in whatever had happened with Chris and Josh. She never had had a chance to talk with him, to find out what he had been doing the last 20 years of his life…

"What are you thinking about?" Nick asked, his brow furrowed. She turned to see him studying her face. How often people took to looking at the depth or reaction of her eyes or the subtleties of her expressions - it had all changed in a matter of weeks. What was once overlooked suddenly became what defined her. They saw her differently than before.

"I was thinking that I'm a pretty special girl to be living here with you." She said shyly. Nick couldn't help but smile, but knowing truthfully that it couldn't have been what she had been really thinking about, but happy just the same, seeing how genuine she was.

It was almost as if they had come to a silent agreement not to talk anymore about what had happened. It wasn't that Sara didn't want to, well she didn't, but rather she desperately wanted some normalcy to return to her upside down life. Was that even possible anymore?

-+-+-

"Nick, Warrick - you have a burglary on the strip. Catherine's with me." Grissom announced and handed them their paper.

"Sweet!" they both said in unison. The team all laughed. It was nice having everyone back again – despite the grief that loomed over them, there was a newfound sense of unity and commitment to one another, along with gratitude that they were back together as a group, as a family. Grissom continued, Sara looked at him expectantly,

"How is the evidence coming on the Randall case?" He asked her.

"Well, I don't know what else I can do with that – it's was a pretty open and closed case." She looked at her boss expectantly, hoping that the words would pass his lips allowing her to return to her work on cases outside of the lab. She was beginning to feel claustrophobic in the CSI building for hours on end and wished to be out and about with her friends again. She knew she had to be ready, but she felt that day would never come unless she leaped into it again and moved past her fears.

Just as Grissom was about to say something, Brass poked his head inside the door.

"Gil – I need to talk to you. Now." He turned to look at Sara, who bore a frown on her face, masked with uncertainty as she looked at the concern in Brass's eyes. Grissom turned back to his crew.

"You guys can all get going – I'll let you know if anything's happening. Sara – just stay here for now while I talk to Jim okay?" She nodded and headed down to DNA to finish up the loose ends on the Randall case. Apprehensively, Jim and Gil walked to Grissom's office and sat down.

"Here's what I know," Brass started.


	24. Chapter 23

A/N – Again. I suck! I know I don't get these up fast enough…finals are looming ahead though – but ill be done classes soon and I love to finish up this story and my other one by new years… We'll see! BTW – to clear some confusion, this story is taking place at some point in season 5, after Grissom finds out about Sara's past, but Nick hasn't been buried alive.

**Chapter 23:**

"You already knew that Sara's Mom…" Grissom nodded to Brass, who seemed extremely concerned about the news he had found out. He placed a newspaper clipping on Gil's desk. "I wanted to look a bit further into her past, what happened with her brother."

"See if he's a real threat or not." Jim nodded. Grissom picked up the paper and read aloud. "_Sidle, a mother of two, 8 year old Sara and 15 year old Daniel has been sentenced to life in prison, without parole for the vicious murder of her husband. Sources say that her daughter witnessed the altercation that eventually led to the death of her father. Both children are in the custody of social services_." He looked up at Brass.

"Why didn't she tell any of us?"

"She didn't want people to know. She wanted to move past what had happened. I think she was scared to turn into her mother. Though, I wouldn't doubt if Catherine knew this by now. Strangely enough, she seems to know more about Sara than any of us do."

"It's a good thing." Brass gave him a small smile, "it's not like any of us will ever understand women." His face returned to seriousness. "However, I think we still need to find out where he is. Did you find any evidence linking him to the rapes?" Grissom shook his head no.

"Doesn't mean there isn't any. There's a pile of evidence that hasn't be processed, but since we've "solved" the case and arrested two men, it probably will never be. And we can't keep dragging this case on and on. For now, this remains between us." Brass nodded in agreement. They didn't notice the brunette standing just outside.

"He's not involved." She said firmly, her eyes filled with fire, mixed with tears of frustration. "Can't you just let it go?" She walked away quickly. Grissom shot up quickly, casting a glance at Jim. They didn't know if she'd run, or what she'd do. They had been trying to protect her from getting upset; they didn't know how she would react. Jim said quickly,

"Let me talk to her." Grissom nodded and Brass hastily ran down the hall in the direction Sara had gone.

-+-+-

"Hey Rick?" Nick asked as he sorted through the trash strewn about the liquor store. "Do you think burglary is ever going to go out of style?" Warrick chuckled.

"Not in our lifetime."

"Look at all the prints we have. Video camera – this guy's an idiot." Nick responded.

"Well," replied Warrick, "It's not like you need a university degree to become a criminal."

"I'm going to take this stuff back to the lab – you okay here?" Warrick nodded, but shot a concerned glance at his friend.

"You're checking up on Sara, aren't you?" Nick looked back sheepishly.

"I just want to make sure she's okay." Warrick nodded.

"How has she been doing lately? I haven't had much time to talk to her." Nick shrugged.

"She's getting there. It's hard but she's stubborn and anxious to recover. I'm worried about her going out into the field though. I think it's too soon, but I'm sure Grissom won't let her for a few more weeks at least."

"Go see how she's doing – I'm fine here. Not more much to do anyways."

"Thanks Warrick." Nick said, as he hurried out the door.

-+-+-

Brass found Sara sitting in the break room, her eyes red with tears. He took a deep breath before sitting down beside her. He wished he could take away her pain; he wished that he could make it all go away.

"Are you okay?" He asked quietly. She nodded. "Do you want to talk about it?" She didn't move. They sat in silence for a few moments until Sara began to speak in a small voice.

"I still dream about it, you know. Hiding under the bed. Watching him hit her. She was going to turn him in. For everything. She had said she was going to do it before, but this time she was serious…"

"How did you know she was serious this time?" Sara tried to fight the tears that welled up in her eyes.

"Because she had caught him…in my bedroom…" She responded, in almost a hollow sounding voice. Brass thought he was going to lose his lunch. Five years, and no one knew the trauma Sara had gone through as a child. She continued, "She took a knife. He ran into my room, so I hid under my bed. He was going to use me, to hide behind. He knew my mom would never hurt me. She got to him before he could get to me. As he lay on the ground, my mom pulled me out from under the bed. She wiped the blood that had splattered on my face. She told me that things were going to change. That Daniel and I would be safe. That no matter what, Daniel and I needed to stay close together, for her. Then they took her away. And they took me away."

"What happened to you and your brother?" Brass asked kindly. This was the information they needed. Maybe there was something between them that would show if her brother would come after her.

"We were put into the same foster home. A few times I had caught him doing bad things. Found some pot under his bed, caught him stealing… He told me every time, that if I didn't want to turn out to be a murderer like mom, I would keep my mouth shut. So I did. He turned 18 two years later. I was almost 11. He pulled me aside and told me he was leaving. And that was the last time I had seen him." She started to cry, and Brass pulled her close.


	25. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24 :**

Nick walked back into the CSI building, dropped off the evidence in the lab, and went to go find Sara. Worried that maybe Grissom had let her leave the lab on some case, he stopped by his office first.

"Nick – what are you doing here?" Grissom asked, his brow furrowed, a look of concern fleeting across his face.

"Just dropping off some evidence from our burglary. This case will be over in no time. Actually, I was wondering if you've seen Sara?" Grissom didn't know how to answer, since he had not seen Brass yet, nor knew if he had caught up with her. Telling Nick she had gotten a little bit angry and left definitely would have caused him to panic. Just as he was about to open his mouth, Jim walked in.

"Nick – you looking for Sara?" He nodded. "She's in the break room."

"Thanks – I'll see you both later." Nick said, as he quickly hurried out of the room. Brass and Grissom both watched him leave, before Jim closed the door.

"So?" Gil asked his friend.

"She told me all about her past. Seeing her father killed, once her mother found out he molested her, social services taking her away. Apparently, from what she told me, Daniel and her went to the same foster home. He did some bad things, told Sara not to tell on him, she wouldn't. Then the day came when he was old enough to leave, and that was the last time she has seen him." Grissom sat in thought. It still didn't answer their question. Was Daniel Sidle a threat, or just another ghost from Sara's past?

**-+-+-**

Nick hurried down the hallways and froze as he stood in the doorway to the break room. Sara sat, unmoving, on the couch, staring off into the distance. Barely breathing, barely blinking, she looked a thousand miles away. Nick immediately panicked, the memories of her catatonic state flooding back. He went over beside her and took her hand.

"Sara?" He said. No answer. "SARA?" He said louder, his heart racing.

**-+-+-**

"Any leads on where Daniel might be right now?" Grissom asked as he handed Jim a cup of coffee.

"It is confirmed that he had a flight booked out of Vegas to Los Angeles, just like Catherine told us. Whether he got on that flight, or still in LA, is still a mystery. He could be long gone. He could even be innocent. I don't know if there's anyway to tell…"

**-+-+-**

Warrick finished gathering all his supplies, strewed about the liquor store. He heard the footsteps of what he assumed was the officer outside.

"I'll be out in a moment Officer Davis." He said, without turning around. The footsteps kept drawing nearer, with no reply. Warrick finally turned around and looked up in shock, as 2 bullets rang out and he dropped to the ground.

**-+-+-**

Sara's head finally turned to face Nick's. His hand reached for her cheek, as she gave him a small smile.

"Sorry, what did you say? I was kind of out of it for a moment." Nick anxiously tried to catch his breath. He never wanted to be scared like that ever again.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She nodded.

"Just a little tired."

"Should I take you home?" She shook her head no.

"I've still got plenty to do here, and I'd rather not sit at home all alone. The shift is almost over anyways." She replied.

"You sure?" She nodded again. The new Sara was definitely less vocal than the old Sara. Not that that was a bad thing, but it was a change that they had all noticed.

"How's your case with Warrick going? Where is he, by the way?" She asked curiously, Nick responded,

"He's still at the crime scene. I just brought back most of the evidence. Won't take long to process. I really should get back to DNA; Warrick should be here any minute. You absolutely sure you're okay?" Sara rolled her eyes, but smiled genuinely.

"Nick, how could I not be okay, with you looking out for me?" This brought a smile to his lips, and though slightly irrationally, he leaned forward and kissed her gently and quickly on the lips. It wasn't an awkward kiss, and after they stared into each other's eyes, Nick knew that he move hadn't been too fast.

"See you later." He said as he smiled and headed down the hall to DNA.


	26. Chapter 25

_A/N – Well I have big plans to finish all both my stories (this one and my Sue Thomas one) before Christmas. I'll be home for the holidays, and during that time I want to put some details into my next stories. I have a new Sue Thomas one, and a new CSI one both being planned out…so expect more posts soon, though please take into consideration finals are looming ahead in the next two weeks! BLAH! _

Chapter 25 

Nick and Sara both sat in shock as Grissom informed them about Warrick. He looked somber as he entered the room, where they were both sitting in silence. Nick went to excuse himself to DNA, but Grissom asked him to stay a second.

"What's wrong?" Sara immediately asked. It wasn't like Grissom to act like this, though the last 3 weeks, he had shown more concern and empathy than the last 5 years she had worked with him.

"I just got a phone call. LVPD responded to a wounded officers call on the strip. He requested back up before he passed out. The police arrived at the scene to see the officer unconscious, but alive outside. They walked into the liquor store. Warrick was shot too." Sara gasped and covered her mouth with her hand, as the tears started to stream down his face. Nick grasped her other hand tightly, pale with the news he had just received.

"Is he okay?" He said quietly. Grissom shook his head.

"I don't know. I haven't heard anything else. I figured you two would want to go to the hospital to see." They both nodded and shot up from the couch. "Just call when you know how he is. I'm going to try and keep this quiet until absolutely necessary. If you need me, I'll be at the crime scene with Greg. I don't want Catherine there. We'll find out who did this." They both nodded silently and rushed out the door, hand in hand, their faces anxious with worry.

-+-+-

"Are you okay?" Her soft voice whispered. He continued to drive, fighting back the tears. Their trip had been silent thus far.

"It's my fault," was all Nick managed to sputter out. Sara took his hand tightly in hers, her thumb caressing the back of his hand in support.

"It's not your fault. Don't think that. He's going to be fine."

"I left him there. I should have stayed."

"And I should have never gone to the library that day I met Chris, or moved to Las Vegas, or gone to Harvard." She replied.

"It's not the same."

"Sure it is Nicky. You didn't want this to happen – we just got to be positive. I made it, and he's much tougher than I'll ever be." He turned, as she gave him a small, sad smile. He tried to return it.

"I know." They pulled into the hospital parking lot and hurried into the emergency room, awaiting any information about their friend.

-+-+-

"I have a brown hair boss." Greg announced, as he carefully picked it up. All the other evidence that Warrick had collected was gone. It was the only lead they had. That and Warrick's testimony, if he was well enough to give it.

"Everything else is clean. The guy wiped up afterwards." Grissom added solemnly. Suddenly his phone chirped. Praying it was Sara or Nick, he quickly flipped it open.

"Hello?" He said anxiously.

-+-+-

"We're looking for a Warrick Brown." Nick repeated again to the harassed looking nurse.

"Sir – are you family?" She replied.

"No – well yes, no not genetically but he's my coworker and friend! I'm from the Las Vegas Crime Lab." He flipped her his badge, which she looked at.

"I'm sorry sir." Nick slammed his fist down in frustration. Sara took him gently by the arm.

"Nick, honey, calm down. It's okay." She whispered, as everyone stared, and the nurse looked wearily on.

"I want to know how my best friend is, is that too much to ask?" Sara's heart broke at the look of despair in Nick's face. An idea popped into her head.

"You want to find out about Warrick? We'll find out about Warrick." She took his hand, and led him down the halls of the hospital, until she reached an office door which read – Dr. Kyle Ferguson M.D.


	27. Chapter 26

A/N – I had extra time on my hands…hehehe 

**Chapter 26:**

"Miss Sidle?" The tall, good-looking doctor asked questioningly as he opened his door. "Are you okay?" He added with concern.

"I'm fine, thank you doctor. You remember Nick Stokes?" He nodded and shook hands, before welcoming them into his office and closing his door. They sat down anxiously.

"What can I help you with?"

"A friend of ours was shot at a crime scene this evening. We want to know how he's doing. The nurse wouldn't tell us anything, and I thought maybe you could help us. You've met him. His name is Warrick Brown. He came in to visit me a few times when I was here."

"I could look where he is, but Miss Sidle, you must understand that I shouldn't. This is breaking patient privilege. You didn't want yours to be broken when you were here." He replied, obviously conflicted.

"I understand that doctor. I have no doubt in my mind, however, that Warrick would want to see us. We just want to know if he's okay. If you can't tell us where he is, at least let us know that he'll make it. He needs his friends, his family with him, during this. If there's anything I understand, it's that." She squeezed Nick's hand gently, and cast him a quick look. He looked at her beautiful face with more respect than before. She had such a way with people. No wonder he had fallen I love with her.

"Hmm…" The doctor typed a few things into his computer. "Your friend is in stable condition and will be fine. But you didn't here it from me, and I'm sure you'll hear from him soon enough. I can't let you know where he is, however."

"Thanks for your help though Dr. Ferguson. We really appreciate it." Nick nodded gratefully, realizing that he hadn't even said a word since they entered his office.

"Off topic, how have you been recovering?" He looked at her with a scrutinizing eye. She gave him a small smile.

"Slowly, but I've got some great people helping me through." The doctor turned to Nick.

"Take good care of her Mr. Stokes." Nick finally found his voice, confident with every emotion his heart felt.

"I will." He and Sara walked out of the office and back down the antiseptic, sterile, halls.

-+-+-

"All you know is that he's in stable condition?" Grissom repeated into the phone. Greg and Brass were listening on his end to the conversation with Nick. "Sara thinks we should tell Catherine? I don't know. Yeah I guess. Maybe let her do it. Okay. Let me know. Bye." He hung up, and faced his two colleagues.

"What's happening?" Brass asked quickly

"That was Nick. They wouldn't let them see him, but Sara went to see Dr. Ferguson, the doctor that attended to her when she was a patient there. He told them that Warrick was in stable condition, but wasn't able to give the room number, since Warrick hadn't given any permission to anyone. Sara thinks we should tell Catherine. I left it up to them. They're going to see if they can find him, just wandering the halls. They'll call back later."

-+-+-

They didn't even know where to look. Stable condition could mean anything. Did he have surgery? Was he in surgery? Was he still in emergency? They checked about every floor, beady eyes watching their presence. No sign of Warrick. Giving up, they made there way out of the emergency room, where they heard a familiar voice.

"What do you mean they were looking for me? You didn't let them in? Stop that – that hurts!" Nick turned to Sara who shot back a big grin. They followed the voice and ripped open the curtain that separated them from their coworker and friend.

"Warrick!" Sara said, bursting into tears. Both men stood shocked for a second, at the sudden emotion. She quickly went to hug him gently.

"Are you okay man? We've been worried sick!" Nick finally said, giving him a small, but anxious grin. Warrick returned it.

"I had a fit when they told me people were looking for me, but they said they couldn't let them in without my permission. By the time I said it was fine, they said you were already gone." Warrick explained, as the nurse continued to bandage his shoulder. Sara grabbed the chair next to him, both men noticing how pale she was. In all the frantic excitement, Nick had forgotten that Sara was still well on the road to recovery, and all ready had been exhausted before they had found their friend had been shot.

"Are you okay?" Nick asked quickly. The nurse left temporarily to give them some privacy. She nodded.

"Just tired." They both looked at her skeptically, but said no more as Warrick explained what happened at the crime scene.


	28. Chapter 27

A/N – Fingers crossed. I want these stories done by Christmas, or by the latest New Years!

Chapter 27 

"I was just finishing everything up at the crime scene. I thought it was the officer outside when this guy came in with a gun. Shot me in the shoulder – second shot missed. I fell back and hit my head and got knocked out. By the time I woke up, police and ambulance had already arrived." Warrick explained.

"Thank goodness he missed." Sara said quietly, still sitting in the chair, pale. Both men kept looking at her, though she insisted she was fine.

"There was something different about the crime scene though, that I noticed while they were wheeling me out." Nick nodded and explained.

"Grissom talked to us. Whoever shot you also cleaned up the crime scene for us. Luckily, I had already taken some of the evidence back to the lab." The doctor walked into the room, and asked Nick and Sara to leave while he finished bandaging Warrick up. He chuckled.

"I guess I won't be doing too much at work for the next few weeks. I should get shot more often!" They both smiled back, and Nick said,

"Don't worry buddy – we'll find something for you to do. I'm going to take Sara home so she can lie down, then I'll come get you, since you're an invalid and can't drive now." Sara tried to protest, but Nick gave her a look and she stayed quiet. They said their goodbyes and headed out the hospital doors.

"Really Nick – I'm fine. I'm sure Grissom need everyone on hand to help with this case, now that Warrick can't do anything and I want to talk to Catherine…" Nick took her hands and stared straight into her beautiful eyes.

"Sara – you look exhausted and pale. I want you to have a rest at home. You can call and I'll pick you up later. Can you honestly look me in the eye and tell me your not tired?" She gave him a small smile.

"Why do you take such good care of me?" Nick just shrugged,

"Because I love you." The continued walking to Nicks car, as he pulled out his phone and dialed the lab,

"Grissom? Hi – I'm taking Sara home so she can rest and then I'll be in, alright?"

-+-+-

"What did we find out from the evidence?" Greg asked curiously. The team was already 3 members short; Sara, who had passed out the moment Nick had tucked her into bed, Warrick, who was still being pieced back together at the hospital and Catherine as well, who had rushed to the hospital the moment she had found out about the shooting.

"Nick had brought in a hair sample as well as a few partials. The rest of the blood evidence and video tapes were taken when the thief returned." Grissom explained.

"So we know it's the same guy?" asked Nick. Grissom shrugged.

"I think that there's reason to believe the guy came back; unless it was an accomplice." They all turned around as they saw their two friends walk in. Everyone quickly greeted Warrick, whose arm was in a sling, followed closely by Catherine. She rolled her eyes and said,

"He wouldn't let me take him home." They all sat back down and went back to work on their mystery liquor store thief.

-+-+-

Sara woke up with a start, and took a minute to accommodate her eyes and place herself. She was still trying to get used to waking up at Nick's house. Well, her house now too. '_I couldn't have slept more than an hour_,' she thought as she looked over to the clock. Still sleepy, but slightly hungry, she slid out of bed and headed to the kitchen to find some food before lying on the couch and watching a movie. _'Nick was right._' She smiled to herself, '_He knows me better than I do_.' She vowed to make things up to him once she was back to normal; repay him for everything he's ever done to help her.

She had finally gotten comfortable on the couch, as relaxed as she could get without Nick there to cuddle with when she heard a knock on the door. Sighing, she retied her robe and dragged herself to the front entry. She threw open the door in surprise, but her smile quickly vanished as the man pushed his way through, gun in hand.


	29. Chapter 28

_A/N - I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas!_

**Chapter 28:**

"So you mean the fingerprint is all we've got?" Warrick asked.

"Yes - and if this guy doesn't have a rap sheet, we're lost." Grissom explained. The whole team gathered, waiting for the news. The bullet that was taken from Warrick's shoulder wasn't very distinct, and Bobby was quick to tell them that it would be impossible to narrow it down to a single gun.

"I guess the thief was smarter than we thought eh Warrick?" He smiled back at his best friend.

"How's Sara doing?" Catherine asked, noticing her absence.

"She was really tired when I got her home; as soon as she hit the pillow, she was gone. Otherwise, I think she's doing okay. She doesn't talk about it much, but things like this take time..." Greg suddenly burst into the room, as everyone quickly stood up.

"You found a match." Greg just nodded and handed the piece of paper to Grissom. He looked at it, stunned for a moment, as everyone glared at him anxiously. Then suddenly he said,

"Call Brass. We need to get a unit to Nick and Sara's place. STAT."

-+-+-

"Where have you been?" Sara asked quickly. The man kept pacing around, the gun held loosely in his hand.

"It doesn't matter." Daniel replied.

"It matters to me Dan. Please, sit down. Put your gun away. I'm no threat to you! I just want to know where you've been, I want to talk to you." He just shook his head, as Sara looked hopelessly onward. She could tell something wasn't right. There was something in his eye. Sara glanced at the drawer where she knew her gun was concealed. Suddenly she felt ridiculous. This was her brother. He wasn't going to hurt her.

"What are you doing here then Daniel?" She asked quietly, sitting down on the couch, still exhausted from the toll of the last few weeks.

"You, You! You put them in Jail." He replied.

"You told me you weren't involved. You promised me you had nothing to do with it. What are you saying?" Sara said, now scared. She got up and tried to make her way over to the table, as her brother continued to wave his gun around.

"You say anything, you'll be just like mom. Killing Dad, giving up on our family. Ruining our lives. Are you really going to turn against me Sara? I'm all you have left. Are you going to get rid of me the way Mom got rid of Dad?"

"That's not going to work anymore Daniel." Sara said, backing up, the tears streaming down her face. He turned to her and pointed his gun at her forehead. "Are you going to kill me?"

"I HAVE TO!" He yelled.

"Please Dan." Her eyes pleaded and she felt her hand grasped the cool metal of her gun. Her eyes were tired, and she fought with every fiber to stay upright. She quickly took her gun and pointed it at her brother. "If I go, you go with me."

"I don't have any reason to live Sara. Go ahead. Shoot me." His eyes menaced. They both turned as they saw Nick's door be thrown wide open, Brass storming in, his gun drawn and pointing at Daniel.

"Daniel Sidle - put the gun down."

"You shoot me - she comes with me!" He cried hysterically. Sara stared at him, her hold steady, tears streaming down her face. Grissom and Nick both rushed in, behind Brass, but Sara wouldn't relinquish the hold she held with her brother's eyes.

"You promised me you weren't involved." She whispered quietly. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Grissom and Nick, looking on frantically, unmoving and unable to do anything. Brass was slowly creeping towards Daniel, who pointed the gun right between Sara's eyes.

"Put the gun down Sara!" He ordered, but she shook her head and grasped the gun tighter.

As Daniel took a step closer to Sara, panic erupted in the room, as Brass and Nick both lunged for Sara's brother. Suddenly, gunshots echoed throughout the room and everything went silent.


	30. Chapter 29

_A/N - well I had some time on my hands - it is Christmas holidays. And i would like to get this story finished! I'm glad you all like it and Happy Birthday CSIFreak6!_

**Chapter 29:**

Everyone stood in shock as the scene before them unfolded. The tall man lay in a pool of blood at Sara's feet. She hadn't moved, the gun still pointed at now the nothingness before her. She couldn't move. She couldn't breath. She could only stay still and hope that someone would save her. Brass lowered his gun and looked in shock, staring at the woman in front of him. Her face was so pale; she looked so scared. But she wouldn't move.

Nick slowly started to make his way towards Sara. She kept staring at where her brother's face had been moments before.

"Sara?" He said quietly. She didn't react except the sobs that continued to rise out of her throat, her gun still held tightly. "Sara. Put down the gun honey. It's okay. It's over." Not knowing what she was going to do, he kept walking towards her slowly, as to not startle her.

Grissom finally regained his composure and watched everyone else. As he saw Nick edge towards Sara, who refused to put the gun down and was started to shake uncontrollably, he rushed outside to get the paramedics who had come.

"Wait." He instructed to them, making sure they waited until Nick got to Sara first. He finally reached her and softly grabbed her hand, prying the gun from her fingers and passing it quickly to Grissom, who bagged it.

"Sara?" He said again quietly, taking her shaking hands in his, trying to get her to look him in the eye. He turned to look at Grissom, concern flooding his eyes. Grissom motioned towards the paramedics - two of them were working on Daniel Sidle, the other two waiting for the go ahead to help Sara. Nick shook his head, and mouthed 'Not yet'.

Sara's eyes started to dart around the room in panic, looking at everything except and moving being. Nick had finally gotten her to lower her arms, her hands wrapped in his.

"Sara?" He said again. Her sobbing wouldn't stop. It was the cries of a scared woman; one who was confused and afraid and didn't know exactly what happened. Just as Nick was about to call the paramedics over, he heard her soft voice through the tears.

"I killed him." With that, she slumped to the ground, her cries shaking Nick's heart as he held her tightly. She could feel the darkness approaching, as she held on tight to Nick, hoping that he would stop her from falling in the dark hole she could see was coming to claim her. Within seconds, she collapsed in his arms.

-+-+-

Sara woke up to the beeping of the heart monitor. It took her a minute to place herself as to where she was. Everything was a blur. She could feel the warm grip on her hand, but the hand was unfamiliar. More calloused, more rough. Sara didn't want to wake him up. He looked like he hadn't slept in hours, but her movements must have brought him from his unconsciousness.

"Are you okay?" Grissom asked quickly. She just nodded. He must have sensed what she wanted to say, because immediately he explained, "We finally got Nick to go home and rest. I'm sure he'll be back really soon." She nodded again. Sara opened her mouth to talk, but found she just couldn't form the words.

"The doctor said you might be in a little bit of shock. Are you having troubles talking?" She nodded again. She felt incompetent, only nodding her head back and forth, not even being able to form a word. Her brain was running at a hundred miles an hour, trying to process what was going on. She was a killer. She was just like her mom. She sold out her family and now they were gone. All of them. She could feel the hot tears stream down her cheeks.

"You didn't kill him." Grissom said quietly. They both turned as they heard the door open and Nick walk in. He rushed in and pulled Sara into a tight embrace, as she screwed up her eyes to try and fight back the tears.

"Are you okay? God, I'm so sorry Sara." He looked at Grissom when she didn't say anything.

"She's having trouble talking. Give her time - the doctor says its stress and completely normal." Grissom explained. Nick turned to look back at Sara, who held his gaze with watery eyes. "I'll let you finish Nick. Feel better okay Sara?" She just nodded, trying to reflect through her eyes the sincerity she felt. She knew Grissom got the point as he smiled at her sadly before he left. Grissom's departure was followed by silence, until Nick finally spoke up,

"You didn't kill him honey." He said quietly, and she nodded slowly, the hope rising in her eyes; the hope that Nick was destroyed to have to dash. "I'm so sorry Sara, he didn't make it. But it wasn't you that shot him." A sob rose from her chest. Part of her felt relieved that it hadn't been her that did it, the other still mourned for her brother.

"Who?" She finally whispered. She needed to know.

"Jim did. We weren't about to lose our girl. Not for anything in the world."


	31. Chapter 30

_A/N - Firstly, I'd like to say it's been a pleasure writing for you all. I'm still in the brainstorming process for another CSI fic. I'm going to be mainly working on my Sue Thomas one for now, until I come up with a fantastic idea for another CSI. Keep your eyes peeled! I hope you all have a wonderful new year and I look forward to your feedback on this story, and on the ones to come. Keep writing - it opens your imagination and shows the part of your soul that is unique to you. Keep those creative juices flowing! With Love, Shellie_

**Chapter 30:**

"Do you want Red Peppers in the salad?" She called out.

"If you do!" He answered as he continued to carry the boxes into the newly painted spare bedroom. The house still smelt new - ready for new adventures, a new chance for life. Sara took time to heal after her brother's death, but finally came to a place where she was able to move on again, with the help of her friends. Nick and her decided a month later that they wanted to move out of Nick's place, just to escape the memories it held, for the both of them. They both had so much money saved up, that they had never really spent, they splurged and got a beautiful house; still close to the lab, but cozy and ready for a fresh start. It was weeks before Sara decided to go back to work, and even longer before she was out of the lab again, but she didn't mind. She knew she couldn't change the past, but instead decided to be grateful for how it had changed her.

Three months after the nightmare had ended, Nick asked Sara to marry him. Both wondered if the decision was rash, but after a simple wedding and over a year of marriage under their belts, they were happier than they could have ever imagined.

"You know, we don't have much time before we have to go to work." Nick said, setting down the final box. "Maybe I can start on this tomorrow." Sara just nodded and smiled and finished setting the table. As they both sat down to eat, Nick looked at his wife and gave her a hesitant look. "Are you ready?" Sara smiled back.

"I think so, I mean, we all knew this was coming and something I had to do."

"Still, I didn't think you would have wanted to…but it is for the best." She nodded and they finished up their meal before heading out to the lab.

-+-+-

Sara took a deep breath before entering the building. She didn't know why she felt nervous, and even a little bit scared; she had walked though those doors thousands of times before. This time was different though, and she knew it. Nick had dropped her off before parking the car, but caught up before she went inside.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked, his eyes flooding with worry. She took his hand.

"Nick, hun, it's not like this is the last time I'm ever going to walk through these doors. I mean, it's hard but I have to do this. Really. I'll be fine." He just raised his eyebrows but followed her into the building.

She couldn't help but notice the stares. People had stared at her a lot, ever since she had come back from the hospital after her brother's death. She didn't like pity, but she knew now it was more for support. She trudged down the halls to the familiar room, where she knew they would be waiting for her.

Tears came to her eyes as she looked around the room, Nick's arm around her waist. A big banner was hung across the break room, bearing the words – Good Luck Sara! Soon everyone was hugging her, tears were flowing and memories were shared. Good memories of the last seven years. It was one of the hardest decisions Sara ever had to make. She never thought she would see the day where she would quit the job she had loved so much. But it was time.

Tired from all the extra weight, she sat down on the couch and watched all her friends laughing. She felt so blessed. As she rested her hand on her swollen abdomen, she knew she was doing the right thing - For her baby, for her and Nick's little girl. She wanted to be a full time mother, and since she had learned about the baby, her forensics career had become less and less important to her. She knew what family meant now. She saw it in her friends and coworkers, in the family her and Nick and their baby were about to become. Nick would stay on as a CSI, and Sara knew that just because she wasn't working at the Las Vegas Crime Lab, that she would lose those bonds she had made so long ago. It was a new start, a new family, and a new life and Sara was excited for it to begin.


End file.
